For Her
by A. Price
Summary: My post seires finale fic, Buffy and Spike reunite ten years after the end. Choices were made thier lives have changed. Can they love again?
1. Default Chapter

The office was spotless not one speck of dust to be seen on the various artifacts lining the shelves. Dawn stared at the titles of the books on the shelves musing to herself that at one time when she was younger she had scoured each of those books during long research hours. She shifted the sleeping toddler on her lap as she waited for the owner of the desk to join her.  
  
The door open and she looked up to see the dark haired man enter, he hadn't changed a bit in the last ten years. She shook her head slightly, of course he hadn't changed, if she saw him in a hundred years he'd still look the same.  
  
"Dawn, how are you?" Angel asked as he took his seat behind the desk smiling as he noticed the child sleeping in her arms.  
  
"I'm good." She looked around the office, "You seem to be doing well too."  
  
"Business is good, I can't complain." He leaned back in the chair, "Is this little guy yours?"   
  
"Yes, his name is Carson, he's eighteen months old." Dawn patted the little boys soft brown hair.  
  
"He's adorable."   
  
"We're proud of him, my husband and I that is." She grinned as the little boy moved a bit to get comfy.  
  
"So, I guess I need to ask is this business or the pleasure of seeing an old friend." Angel asked leaning forward on the desk top.  
  
"We weren't ever really friends were we?" She smiled slightly, "But I do have a problem and I think you can help."  
  
He raised his eyebrow at her, "I guess we weren't really friends, but you are Buffy's sister and I'll do what I can, you know that. Now what's the problem?"  
  
"I want you to tell me about Spike." Her expression became very serious.  
  
"What about him, Dawn. It's been ten years since.....do you really want to dredge up ancient history?" His seriousness matched her own.  
  
"I saw him last night....he came into this building. I was with my dad so I didn't follow him. It was him though, wasn't it?"   
  
"Spike died ten years ago, Dawn. You're mistaken." Angel sighed at the hurt in the girls eyes.  
  
"Angel, I don't know why he never let us know he was alive, or why he was here and right now I don't care. But Buffy needs him... and I know it was him. Please tell me the truth." Tears threatened to spill from her eyes as she pleaded with him.  
  
"Buffy needs him? I talked to Giles just a few months ago. Buffy was fine." Concern filled his voice.  
  
"Giles told you she's fine? Angel, Buffy's husband died two years ago from lymphoma. She's far from fine right now." Dawn shook her head in disbelief, she'd have to talk to Giles. she knew he meant well but sometimes he handled things completely wrong.  
  
"But she just had her second child about two years ago, didn't she?"  
  
"Yes, David died when Tierney was three months old. His insurance took care of most of the bills but she still had to sell the bigger house and move to a smaller one and she works at a law office as a receptionist. She's tired most of the time but she always makes time for the girls they go to the park every afternoon when she picks them up from daycare, she's a great mom, but she's lonely and needs someone in her life. When dad and I were out last night and I saw Spike....I knew that I had to tell him."  
  
Dawn took a deep breath, "So, please tell me, where is he?"  
  
"Dawn, are you sure Buffy would want to see him, she's believed he was dead, she moved on, she loved her husband right?" Angel ran a hand through his hair.  
  
"Yes, she did love her husband, but he's gone. And you have to know that she looked for Spike for two years after he supposedly died, she'd go back to Sunnydale and search for him just in case. This isn't meant to hurt you, Buffy cares for you Angel, but you know who her heart was with the last time you visited Sunnydale."   
  
Angel stood, "Dawn, please let me handle this, I know a way to get him to Buffy. But I need details about Buffy's life okay, like where this park is she goes too etc. And.....if this doesn't work out the way you want it too, I don't want you to be angry...because in the end this is their choice not ours."  
  
"Thank you!" Dawn stood excitedly, she began to walk around the room as she filled Angel in on Buffy's life.  
  
"I'll let you know something when it's all set up, okay?"   
  
"Okay. I'll talk to you soon." Dawn smiled as she left the office.  
  
******  
  
Angel picked up the phone and dialed the number....he hoped this wasn't a mistake.   
  
" Hello." Spike's voice answered on the other end.  
  
"Spike, I've got an out of town job for you. Can you come over and get the details?" Angel asked tapping a pencil on the edge of his desk.  
  
"Sure, I'll be there shortly. Where out of town?" Spike asked before he hung up the phone.  
  
"Bartlett, Tennessee. You may be there a little while so please pack a couple changes of clothing."   
  
"Fine, Peaches. I'll pack now so I get moving." He hung up the phone and pulled opened the closet pulling out a half dozen shirts in dark colors and three pairs of basic black jeans. Stepping to the bureau he smiled at the picture of the blond in the silver frame. One long finger touched her smiling face, "Got to go away a few days, sweetness." He whispered the words as he pulled out tee shirts and socks.  
  
Turning off the light he swung the duffle on his shoulder and left for Angel's office.  
  
"I'm here, oh broody one." Spike snarked as he opened Angel's office door and sat down in the chair across from his desk.   
  
"Good, I need you to go to Bartlett and meet his guy for me, he's got some information for me about the whereabouts of a former Wolfram and Hart employee. I need to get in touch with this guy, I need his legal advice." Angel handed him a folder with all the information he would need in it.  
  
As Spike listened to Angel explain the details of the job he caught the faint scent of someone familiar, someone from his past and another scent the scent of a child? No, his nose was playing tricks on him, Dawn had moved out of state ten years ago.  
  
"Spike, are you listening?" Angel asked when he noticed the odd look on the younger mans face.  
  
"Yes, I got it. Meet this guy in the park at dusk. He'll give me information about this Lindsey person. Why would you trust anyone who had even formerly worked for Wolfram and Hart?"  
  
Angel shook his head, "Lindsey was different. He got out of there before he was totally corrupted."  
  
"Okay, guess I'm leaving tonight," He glanced at the time on the ticket, "Better go now."  
  
"They'll be a rental car waiting for you, and Spike, don't forget to check in this time." Angel rolled his eyes at his friend.  
  
"I will, I will, dad!" Spike grinned as he closed the door behind him.  
  
Angel sighed as he leaned back in the chair. Spike would either thank him or kill him for this and Buffy? He wasn't sure what to expect from her. The last time he'd seen her, she had explained about Spike, it hurt he wouldn't lie but so much had passed between them and he couldn't lie he'd found he could have feelings for other women since Buffy. He had not spoken to her directly for ten years now, getting his information through Giles, who it seemed had not been completely honest with him. He wanted to be angry with the man, but he realized that the former Watcher was doing what he thought best to protect Buffy and he couldn't fault him that. Afterall he'd kept something important from her too for all these years.  
  
He closed his eyes and rememberd that night eight years ago when he had ran into a ghost. He had been sitting in a bar feeling brooding over the changes in his life, the ridiculous thing with Cordy that was doomed before it began, giving up Connor and fighting to regain his friendship with Wesley again. Gunn and Fred finally marrying and moving north.  
  
****  
  
He heard the voice before he saw the shock of platinum hair at the end of the bar. No, it couldn't be. But it was there was one William the Bloody standing there in front of him, alive - well undead as it were.   
  
"spike!" He'd called out to the blond who had jerked around to see who was calling him.   
  
The blond vampires face had frozen. "Angel."  
  
"You aren't dust?" Angel asked suspiciously.  
  
"Doesn't look that way." Spike had patted his coat and grinned guiltily.  
  
"Why aren't you dust?" Angel moved to take the stool next to him.  
  
"I'm hurt." Spike replied sarcasm dripping from his voice.  
  
"No, you're not but I know someone who was hurt....she thinks your dead. How could you do this to Buffy?" Anger flared in Angel's voice now.  
  
"She...she didn't need me. After what went down in Sunnydale, I knew she was finally going to be able to have that normal life. Faith was more then happy to be the Slayer. I figured it was easier for her to believe I was dead, hey I went out a hero in her eyes." Spike sighed as he sipped his drink.  
  
"But she had the right to know, Spike." Angel admonished him.  
  
"Well, I think she's better off, I'm sure she got over it and moved on. You would know - is she happy? No details please, just tell me she's happy." Spike's voice was an almost whisper at the end of the sentence.  
  
"Giles says she is." Angel admitted.  
  
"See, it's all for the best then. And you won't ruin this right, you won't tell?" Spike pleaded.  
  
"On one condition, you come to work for me? I could use some help and I figure you'll work for cheap." Angel had grinned at the man next to him.  
  
"What makes you think I'm still a do gooder?" Spike had asked over the rim of his mug.  
  
"You still love Buffy?" Angel asked complete seriousness reflecting in his eyes.  
  
"Of course, I do." Spike answered defensively.  
  
"Then I would wager you're still a do gooder. Do you accept my offer?"   
  
Spike had took another long sip of his beer before answering, "I suppose I do."  
  
****  
  
That had been eight years ago and Spike had been a model employee if you didn't count the times he deliberately disobeyed his boss, the name calling and the week long drunk he engaged in once a year on Buffy's birthday.  
  
Angel sighed again as opened the dark blinds and watched the tail lights of the DeSoto head towards the airport.  
  
*****  
  
Spike arrived at the Memphis airport late, as promised the rental car was waiting for him. Grudgingly he admitted that at times Angel could be a good boss. After asking for directions he soon found himself at the hotel in Bartlett. Tomorrow evening he would find the park and his contact. He really couldn't imagine what Angel needed with Lindsey McDonald there were plenty of lawyers in LA. Oh, well it was a paid trip and Spike could use a bit of time away to think and brood , there was no way in hell he was going to brood in front of Angel.   
  
***  
  
The next evening  
  
Buffy tried to smile as the Jan the head of the daycare explained why they were having to raise their prices again. Inside she was reeling, she wasn't sure if her already stretched budget could afford another increase. The two small girls clinging to her legs were tired and ready to go. "Mommeeeeee." The smallest of the two whined.   
  
"Just a minute, Tierney." Buffy bent over to pick her daughter up.  
  
"Anyway, I'm sorry, Buffy but we have no choice.' Jan's voice was sympathetic.  
  
"It's okay, we'll make do. See you tomorrow." Buffy told her as Tierney lay her head on her mommy's shoulder and the older daughter Brenna took her offered hand. "Are you two sure you want to go to the park tonight, you both look tired."  
  
"Yes, we want to go!" Brenna answered suddenly perking up in her booster seat.  
  
"Park!" Tierney agreed from her car seat.  
  
"Okay, I was just checking.' Buffy smiled into the rear view mirror as she looked at her girls. Brenna was four and a minature of her mother except her hair was a soft brown, she was shy like her father, Tierney at two had Bufy's mouth and blond curls, but she looked more like her dad, she definitely had her mother's temprament though.  
  
'We're here!" Buffy exclaimed as she pulled into the small parking lot.  
  
"Yay!" Brenna and Tierney called out together.  
  
Buffy opened the rear door and unfastened the car seat buckles, after grabbing their buckets and shovels, the girls climbed from the car and raced to the sand box. Buffy followed closely behind taking a seat on the bench at the edge of the sand. The girls laughed as they played in the sand and Buffy mentally tried to figure out how she was going to keep them in the daycare.   
  
So lost in her thoughts Buffy didn't seem to notice as dusk creeped nearer, she wasn't really worried about the dark, in the eight years she'd lived here she had only ran into two vamps and had quickly dispatched them. So she didn't hurry when she   
  
began to gather the girls and their toys.  
  
***  
  
Spike quickly found the park, he parked the rental car and got out into the early dusk. He could see a woman with two children in the distance, something about the woman was familiar a small chill ran through him, she was blond and petite and no way, but the scent on the slight breeze. screamed 'it's her!'. He couldn't help himself he had to find out for sure. Walking slowly he headed towards the sandbox.  
  
"Get your bucket, Tierney." Buffy said standing next to the sandbox.  
  
"Don't want to go." Tierney stood and stuck out her bottom lip in a patented Buffy pout.  
  
"Well, we have to. You have to eat dinner and take your bath." Buffy knelt next to the stubborn little girl.  
  
"NO!" The little girl shouted and sat her plump bottom back down in the sand.  
  
Brenna stood next to her mom her sandbucket and shovel in hand, she sighed at her sister's behavior.  
  
Buffy felt the familiar tingle before she turned around, a vampire was near, great! of all nights.  
  
She grabbed Tierney up in her arms the little girl struggling with her and took Brenna's hand tightly in hers. "Can you run to the car with, Mommy?"   
  
Brenna nodded as Tierney pouted at her mom. Buffy turned towards the car, scanning for the vampire. She was startled to hear a familiar voice, "Do you need help?" She turned to find herself face to face with a dead man - literally.  
  
Spike had seen her rushing with the children and was afraid she was in some kind of danger, he hadn't meant to speak. The realization that it was really Buffy hit him hard, he stepped back hitting the edge of the sandbox and landing on his rear.  
  
Tierney and Brenna both laughed then, that sweet tinkling little girl laugh. Buffy stared down at her daughters and then Spike in the sandbox struggling to maintain his dignity. Despite her confusion she laughed too.  
  
Spike finally found his voice, "What's so funny?"  
  
"You fell on your bottom." Brenna shyly informed him as Tierney pointed and laughed again.  
  
Spike stood and dusted off the sand, smiling he replied, "The oldest one looks like you, but that little one, she definitley acts like you."  
  
Buffy offered a small smile in return, "It's really you. "  
  
"And you with minature versions." He couldn't take his eyes off of her, it had been ten long years since he'd been graced by her beauty. Great I'm with her for two seconds and I'm reverting back to William the poet.   
  
Buffy stared at him for a moment without speaking, she felt a small hand pulling at her arm, "Mommy, is he your friend?" Brenna asked softly.  
  
"Um...yes, from a long time ago. Brenna, Tierney this is Mr..."  
  
"Spike." He finished for her, he knelt down and took Brenna's hand in his, "Very nice to meet you, Brenna." The little girl smiled at him before hiding behind her moms legs. Standing he then took Tierney's hand, "And you too Tierney." The two year old just giggled at him.  
  
"How? I thought...I thought you were dead. You...you stayed til the end." Buffy backed up and sat on the bench, "You sent me away."  
  
"Long story, pet." Spike cautiously sat beside her, Brenna climbed up between them.  
  
"So how long have you been back? Where were you? Why? Why didn't you let me know? I looked for you......" Buffy's voice was soft and tears were dangerously close to spilling. She brushed her eyes with the back of her hand.  
  
"Mommy?" Brenna asked her little face scrunched with worry.  
  
"It's okay, sweetie." Buffy ran her hand through the little girls hair.  
  
"Can we go somewhere and talk maybe?" Spike asked hopefully, he had sworn he would never see her again, but now.....  
  
"I...I.." Buffy stammered.  
  
Spike sighed in realization, "Your husband is probably waiting isn't he? I'm sorry, Buffy. I didn't think. I'll go." He stood.  
  
"My husband is dead." She spoke in an almost whisper.  
  
"Oh....." Spike nodded his head, "I'm sorry....I didn't know." He sat back down on the bench.  
  
"Of course you didn't. You don't know anything about me do you? Tell me how long ?" She wasnt' sure exactly what she was asking.  
  
"Pet....I can explain. But not here, these little ones don't need to hear all of this. Have you had dinner?" Spike asked Brenna.  
  
"No, we eat when we go home from the park." She answered matter of factly.  
  
"What would you like to eat?"   
  
"Happy Meal!" Brenna grinned excitedly.  
  
"Happy meal." Tierney agreed.  
  
"Well.....is that okay, mom?" He looked at Buffy for permission. He could see her confusion begging to be edged with anger.  
  
"You can't just come charm my children and think....." Buffy started but the grins on the little girls faces stopped her, "Fine we can have happy meals tongiht but that means we can't have them Friday okay?" Her tight budget allowed happy meals once a week.  
  
The little girls shook thier heads in agreement.  
  
"Where is the closest McDonalds?" He asked as they started back towards the parking lot, "It's my treat."  
  
"Just down the road., and you don't have to treat." He recognized the stubborn look on her face.  
  
"I want too." He told her as they entered their respective cars. He followed her to the restaurant and parked next to her.  
  
Buffy and the girls walked up to the counter with Spike following. "What kind do you want?" He knelt on one knee next to the girls.  
  
Brenna spoke first, "Cheeseburger and sprite."  
  
"One cheeseburger happy meal with sprite, please." Spike looked up at the girl behind the counter she smiled her brightest at the good looking man on his knee. "And you?" He asked Tierney.  
  
"Nuggets." Tierney smiled brightly at him.  
  
"A nugget meal with sprite?" He tilted his head towards Tierney as she nodded yes, "What about mom?" He stood up beside Buffy.  
  
"I'm not hungry." She frowned slightly.  
  
"Well you should be, still as thin as ever even after having babies." He looked at the menu on the wall, "Two of those number three's please with cokes." He paid for the food and carried the tray to the table the little girls followed. Buffy stopped to get napkins, straws and ketchup.  
  
"Tierney needs a booster." Brenna informed him as she crawled into the booth.  
  
"A booster?" Spike asked raising his eyebrow.  
  
"A booster seat, she can't reach her food." Brenna told him as she herself settled in the booth, "Over there on the shelf." She pointed to a shelf with several plastic booster seats on it.  
  
"Oh, I'll fetch one." He told her, turning and almost bumping into Buffy, "Sorry, got to go get the booster." He came back with the chair and sat it in the booth, Buffy helped Tierney climb up on it.  
  
Spike handed out the food and was happy to see the girls giggling as they ate their meals. Tierney even offered him a nugget but he declined with a thank you and watched her alternately play with the small toy from the meal and take a bite of her food.  
  
Buffy had been quietly eating her food, thinking, so many questions in her mind. "Why don't you come to the house and after the girls go to bed, we can really talk."  
  
" I could do that," The thought of spending more time with her made him smile, Angel was never gonna believe...damn....he suddenly remembered his why he was here in the first place, " oh shi....but I need to check in first........" His expression sheepish, he changed his wording, "Oh, darn, I forgot I went to the park on an assignment, I guess I blew that, was there anyone there besides you and the girls?"   
  
"Assignment?" Buffy asked curiously.  
  
"Yeah, I actually work now. Detective agency. I was supposed to   
  
meet someone at the park." Spike pulled a small phone from his pocket.  
  
"There wasn't anyone else at the park tonight." Buffy commented, "Maybe he didn't show."  
  
"Maybe." Spike dialed the number he was wanting and got a message, "Yeah, Peac...Peterman.....I missed that guy tonight at the park, I'll call when I get to the hotel with more details." He turned off the phone and stuck it back in his pocket.  
  
He wasn't sure it was a good idea for her to know who is employer was yet.  
  
"Tierney!!!!!" Brenna's voice suddenly startled the adults.  
  
"Sorry." Tierney pouted as she looked at the orange soda rolling off the table and on to her sister's lap.  
  
Buffy sprung into action grabbing napkins and soaking up the spilled drink, "It's okay, sweetie. It was an accident."  
  
"But I'm wet now." Brenna complained  
  
"We'll get you home and into some dry things." Spike began to clear the wrappers and trash from the table.  
  
Tierney continued to pout at her sister, "Sorry." She repeated.  
  
."She always spills stuff." Brenna frowned at her sister.  
  
"She didn't mean to Brenna." Buffy mopped up the soda from Brennas shirt.  
  
"She's not a big girl like you so she hasn't learned how to keep from spilling like you." Spike told Brenna giving Tierney a wink.  
  
"Guess so." Brenna considered this for a moment, "It's okay, Tierney."  
  
Tierney flashed her a brilliant smile before a big yawn escaped. "Time for a bath and bed." Buffy picked up the tired little girl.  
  
"And a story." Brenna added as she took Spike's hand. He smiled down that small girl his eyes lingering on her small hand in his. Buffy also noticed Brennas hand, funny Brenna was usually so shy and she really wasn't exposed to alot of men. Spike's charm....Buffy sighed as she put the girls back in the car.  
  
***  
  
Spike followed Buffy to a small house in an older but nice neighborhood. He followed her to the door as he girls brought their small back packs with them from the car, she turned to Spike, "Come in, Spike."  
  
He smiled as he stepped through the door. The house was comfortably lived in, a large overstuffed couch with matching chair sat in the living room a shelf held what looked like every Disney video ever made and another held lots of children's books. "Have a seat while I go run some bathwater." Buffy dissappeared down a hallway.  
  
"Can you read?" Brenna asked him as she pulled a book fromthe shelf and sat down next to him.  
  
Spike raised his eyebrow at her, "Yes, I can read."  
  
"Good, " She handed him the book as Tierney climbed up to sit on his other side.  
  
"Okay, I guess we'll read." Spike grinned at the girls, Tierney still yawning as she settled against him to look at the pictures.  
  
He opened the book to find that it was a pop up book a huge spider popped off the page at him, the girls giggled as he began to read, "There was an old woman who swallowed a fly, I wonder why she swallowed that fly, perhaps she'll die."  
  
Brenna smiled up at him, "Go on."  
  
He began to read again, "There was an old woman who swallowed a spider, that wiggled and jiggled and squiggled inside her, she swallowed the spider to catch the fly, I wonder why she swallowed that fly.."  
  
"Girls," Buffy entered the room and called to her daughters, she was surprised to see them firmly entrenched one on each side of Spike as he read to them.  
  
He stopped at the interruption, "Cor, Buffy this is as bad as some of those ancient spell books, swallowing flys and spiders. It's a wonder they aren't scared."  
  
"Finish."Tierney pointed at the book.  
  
"Yes, by all means, please fiinish then they can take their bath." Buffy smiled despite herself as she sat down in the chair across from the couch.  
  
Spike began to make funny voices as he read the rest of the book, coming to the end, "There was an old woman who swallowed a horse......she died of course." He was solemn as he spoke the last words then closed the book and handed it back to Brenna.  
  
"Time for a bath and then bedtime." Buffy put the book back on the shelf and led the girls down the hall,   
  
"I'll be back in a few minutes. Television remote is on the endtable by the chair."  
  
Spike stood and began to walk around the room, the endtable that held the remote also held a montage picture frame, he picked it and looked at each of the pictures, at the top was a wedding photo, Buffy in a simple white dress, her hair up with ringlets surrounding her face, beside her stood a tall man, he was nice looking and one look at this face proved to Spike that this man had deeply loved Buffy it was in his wide smile and his eyes. Buffy's face was equally adoring of the man beside her. Spike smiled at how happy they must have been, she'd deserved that. The second picture was one of Buffy in a hospital bed, a redfaced baby with dark hair wrapped tightly in a blanket that she held close to her breast, the third was another hospital scene this time the baby had fine blond hair and a little girl sat next to Buffy on the bed.  
  
The bottom picture was sad , Buffy sat next to her husband, but he appeared thinner and frailer then in the wedding picture, his eyes still carried the love though as he sat with a small girl on his lap and Buffy held a tiny baby in her arms.   
  
The wall down the hallway was lined with pictures of the little girls separate and together. And there was a picture of Dawn graduating and then Dawn smiling in a wedding gown and finally a family portrait with Dawn holding a little boy on her lap. Niblet all grown up. Pictures of Willow and Xander , Giles, Faith and even Andrew completed the gallery. He could hear the girls laughing as they bathed just down the hall.  
  
"Time to get out and go to bed." Buffy's voice filtered into the hallway.  
  
In a few minutes they exited the bathroom wrapped in towels. "Just a minute." Buffy told him as she took the girls to their room.  
  
He went back to the living room and turned on the tv. "Spike." Buffy called from down the hall.  
  
"Yeah?" He called back.  
  
"The girls want to say goodnight."   
  
"Okay." He walked down the hall to the bedroom the little girls shared. It was pure little girl decorated in pink and purple with Disney heroines on the walls. He grinned as he noticed Mr. Gordo sitting on a top shelf with many other stuffed animals.  
  
"Goodnight, Mr. Spike." Brenna smiled from under her covers.  
  
"Night, night." Tierney waved at him.  
  
"Goodnight, sleep tight." He waved at them as he stood in the doorway.  
  
"NIght, girls. Love you." Buffy kissed each girl and left the room. She turned to Spike, "Now I think it's time for my explanation."  
  
He followed her back into the living room and watched as she settled on the couch. He took the chair, this was going to be more difficult then he had imagined. He was quiet for a long time, trying to decide how to begin. Buffy decided to begin for him.  
  
" Have you even tried to see me before now? Please tell me you've been held prisoner somewhere for the last ten years! Telll me that there was no way you could contact me....please tell me." Buffy's voice rose slightly her eyes pleading for an answer other then the most obvious one.  
  
"I..I..let me start from the beginning. After I sent you out of that cavern, I felt myself burn, I was sure it was over. But later I woke up, a bit worse for wear sore and burned in places but I was still me. I'm not sure how long I stayed there resting before I went above and found that Sunnydale was gone. I knew in my heart that you and Niblet had escaped I could feel it and I knew ....I just knew you had a shot at normal."  
  
His blue eyes stared hopelessly at her willing her to understand.  
  
"So you decided what you thought was best for me?" She shook her head, "Do you know that I went back and looked for you for two years? And all that time....you were just like Angel afterall. You left me for my own good. And you thought that the two of you were so different." Her words sounded bitter even to herself.  
  
"I guess..I suppose you could say that. But at the time it seemed right and what if I had found you? Then what? Those two little girls in there sleeping, would you give them up? They wouldn't be here now if I hadn't left you alone. A long time ago, when I was still stupid," Buffy gave him a look that said maybe it wasn't that long ago, he shook his head at her and continued, "Back when I had the gem of amarra and I attacked you - I said something that at the time seemed witty, something about the ring of amarra sponsoring my killing you. Do you remember?"  
  
She nodded at the memory, "Yes I remember, but what does that have to do with anything?"  
  
"I'd like to think that my letting you think I was dead sponsored your life now, you had normal, Buffy. You married a man you loved, I can tell by the picture," He pointed towards the endtable, "and he loved you and you have two beautiful little girls. I understand why you're angry at me and I may be a selfish oaf but I'd do it all over again if it meant you got to have this again." He picked up the picture frame and shoved it at her.  
  
She took the picture from him and ran her finger over the face of her husband, a tear ran down her cheek,  
  
"But he left me too, Spike. The men I love always leave." Her voice was a whisper as soft sobs began to escape.  
  
He was by her side in a fraction of a second, arms around her as she sobbed against his chest, letting go of long pent up anger and grief. He held her against him soothing her hair and letting her cry it out.  
  
*****  
  
After fifteen minutes of steady crying. Buffy sniffed and pulled away from Spike, "I'm sorry, and I'm snotty," she reached for a tissue and blew her nose, "I don't know where all that came from."  
  
"I think it needed to be let out, have you been able to do that since he died? I mean to let go and be angry?" Spike asked as she pulled another tissue from the box and dabbed at her swollen eyes, "No, you've been big, strong Buffy haven't you?"  
  
"I had to be strong for the girls. Tierney was just an infant when he died and Brenna was only two, they needed their mommy." Buffy explained as wadded up the tissue and tossed it in a small wastecan at the end of the couch.  
  
"You know it's okay, you can be angry that he left you as long as you understand that he had no choice in the matter, and I think you know that, I can tell by looking at that picture that the last thing he wanted to do was leave you and his children." Spike reached his hand slowly towards Buffy pushing her hair away from her face, "You seem to catch a lot of lousy breaks, Buffy. I'm sorry about that. But those little girls they're the best thing that's ever happened to you."  
  
"I know he didn't want to go, when he got sick we kept thinking, this will be okay, we'll get through it, but we knew after a few months that it was going to beat us, so we tried to make the most of every day, I was so afraid he would miss Tierney's birth. I sometimes think he held on just for me so that he could be there when she was born for me and so he could see her. He went downhill pretty quickly after her birth, he was in pain and so tired. Brenna would climb on his lap and I know that sometimes it hurt him just to have her there, but he would bear it anyway and read her a book or watch a cartoon. He only got to hold Tierney a few times, he was afraid he might drop her." Fresh tears filled Buffy's eyes as she spoke.  
  
"How did you meet him?" Spike asked as he handed her a tissue.  
  
"Dawn and I moved to Memphis after leaving Sunnydale, it's a long story how we ended up here, but anyway. About eight years ago, an apartment in our building caught fire, David was a fireman. The fire wasn't too big and was put out easily, but we were all evacutated, he knocked on our door to make sure we left the building and he had this smile, great big friendly Southern smile and when the fire was out he walked us back to our apartment and asked me to dinner. I told him I wasn't really looking to date right now, and he said good cause he really just needed someone to try out this new barbeque place - no commitment and Dawn was invited too." Buffy smiled at the memory.  
  
"So you went for the barbeque?" Spike asked with a grin.  
  
"Well, yeah. Memphis is known for it's barbeque." She laughed softly, "Also he had that smile and these sweet old fashioned manners and hey, fireman!"   
  
"Wish I'd known about this fireman thing before, could have bought some suspenders way back then." Spike winked at her, "So after this dinner you decided to date?"  
  
She rolled her eyes at him, "No we didn't decide to date then, we decided to try every barbeque place in town and two years later we got married and we had the reception at....."  
  
"A barbeque place?" Spike replied.  
  
"You got it, the one we had our first dinner in. I haven't been there since he died." Her voice was sad.  
  
"You should go then."   
  
"Not in the budget." Buffy shook her head as if that could clear away her sadness.  
  
"You're having money troubles?" Spike asked concern heavy in his voice.  
  
"We get by, just on a strict budget, the insurance paid most of the medical bills. But I do have to work and daycare just went up again and Brenna's feet are growing like weeds, and I'm sorry. I didn't mean to go on and on like that. Really we're okay." Buffy yawned and closed her eyes.  
  
"I think that's my cue to leave. Is it okay if........would you mind if I came to see you again? I'm not sure how long I'll be here and I don't want to intrude." Spike sounded almost nervous as he stood up.  
  
"I suppose that would be okay. The girls seem to like you, they don't really have a lot of male influence in their lives. " Buffy stood up and walked him towards the door.  
  
"So I can come see the girls?" He asked a mischevious glint in his eyes.  
  
"Yeah, they would like that." Buffy opened the front door and he stepped out into the darkness, "I'd like it too." She smiled at him shyly.  
  
"Goodnight, Buffy."   
  
"NIght, Spike." she called after him and then she closed the door and went to take her shower. She somehow felt lighter, maybe talking to Spike had helped. She checked on the girls before she went to bed smiling.  
  
****  
  
Spike's smile matched Buffy's on the drive back to his hotel. Despite tragedy she had been happy, she had the normal dream if only for a little while and she had two beautiful babies and she hadn't staked him, all in all it was a good night. Now he had to call Angel and try to get out of explaining how he had blown his assignment tonight. He wasn't ready to tell Angel about Buffy, maybe tomorrow.  
  
He settled on the hotel bed and dialed the phone. "Hello." Angel's voice answered on the other end.  
  
"Angel, I missed the guy at the park sorry. Any way to contact him?" Spike asked.  
  
"I'll see what I can do. How did you miss him?" Angel chided.  
  
"I guess he didn't show. I got to the park but there was.....there was a woman there with a couple of kids and she looked like she needed some help........so I got distracted." Spike explained nervously.  
  
Angel picked up on the nervousness and smiled, "So you got distracted by a woman.....did you help her, was she pretty?"  
  
"I think I helped her a little and yeah she's absolutley gorgeous, got great kids too and..." Spike stopped himself he didn't want to give anything away.  
  
"Guess maybe you better stick around there a few days see if you can find that guy, that okay with you?"  
  
Angel smiled on the other end of the line.  
  
"Oh yeah, I think that's a good idea." Spike hastily agreed.  
  
"How is she, Spike?" Angel's tone turned serious.  
  
"How is she?" Spike repeated the question then it's meaning sunk in, "You....you knew she was here, that she would be at that park? How? Why?" He was angry at being set up now.  
  
"Before you blow up, let me ask you a question, if I told you she was there would you have gone to her?"  
  
"Probably not." Spike grudgingly answered.  
  
"So that's why I didn't tell you, Dawn saw you in LA a few days ago. She came to me demanding answers. She's a stubborn girl, wonder where she get's that?" He laughed lightly.  
  
"Summer's women trait, I suppose." Spike replied, "So the Niblet saw me, what does that have to do with you sending me to Buffy?"  
  
"Dawn said that Buffy needed you. She explained the situation and although I'm not really sure why, I agreed with her. So how is she?"   
  
"She's tired and worries about money I think. She has to work and put her kids in daycare and I think sometimes she's lonely. But she loves those kids and she's a great mum. You should see her with them."  
  
Angel sighed, "So how did she take seeing you, finding out the truth?"  
  
"She was angry of course, but I talked to her, I think she understands why I did it? Did you know that she looked for me - for two years?" Spike asked in wonder.  
  
"Dawn told me, I'm not sure why that surprises you. She told me you were in her heart, she loved you Spike." Angel shook his head.  
  
"She told me..at the end but.....I just wanted to get her out of there, so I didn't want to accept it and I guess over the years I've tried to convince myself that she didn't." It was Spike's turn to sigh now.  
  
"Buffy doesn't say 'I love you' easily if she said it, she meant it." Angel replied softly.  
  
"I know that now. But still I did the right thing by her, she has a family and with me around she wouldn't have that."  
  
"And now? Now that she needs you again, what will you do?"  
  
"I'm gonna help her out as much as the stubborn woman will let me. I..I love her Angel. I always will."  
  
Spike's voice was strong and clear.  
  
"I know the feeling." Angel answered, "Check in with me tomorrow, okay?"   
  
"Tomorrow." Spike agreed as he ended the connection.  
  
Angel picked up the phone again, "Dawn, he's made contact.....yes, I think it went okay. She was upset but Spike says she's okay.....he say's he's going to help her.....I'll let you know....Your welcome." He hung up the phone again.  
  
Dawn hung up the phone and smiled, this was going to work out just the way she planned. She'd call her sister tomorrow night just to check on her. Buffy was going to okay.....she and Spike would make sure of it.  
  
TBC 


	2. part two

Buffy overslept by twenty minutes and was in a rush the next morning. She barely got the girls there breakfast before they had to rush to daycare. Kissing them soundly she left them in Miss Jan's care and hurried to work making it without a minute to spare. She sat down at her desk and began to look through a stack of folders that needed filing. Her mind was still reeling from last night - Spike was alive and he was here.  
  
The morning passed quickly for her as she answered the phone and typed and filed, she went outside at lunch and enjoyed the sunshine and a coke with a side of old memories. When she returned the phone rang again and this time it was Miss Jan from daycare with bad news Brenna and Tierney were both feverish and throwing up. She had already had to send five other children home, there was a nasty stomach virus going around and the daycare had been hit hard. Buffy hung up the phone and nervously knocked on her Mr. Brannon's door. She explained the situation and he told he she could leave early but he expected her to work late the next day. She agreed quickly as she grabbed her purse and headed for the daycare. She wasn't sure who she could get to watch the girls tomorrow - all of her friends worked. She was almost in tears as she picked up the girls, she really needed this job.   
  
Brenna and Tierney were both quiet and pale when she picked them up, "Come on sweeties, we're going home and we'll take a cool bath and have a popsicle, that will make you feel better."   
  
"Okay, mommy." Tierney agreed right before the gagging started. Buffy turned to the back seat to find her   
  
her throwing up into the car seat.   
  
"Tierney, you okay?" Buffy pulled the car into a gas station. leaning over the backseat she tried to clean her up with a box of tissues.  
  
"I'm sorry. " The little girl began to cry.  
  
"It's okay, honey. Let's get you home so we can get you clean and feeling better. Brenna you okay?"  
  
Buffy asked as she started the car.  
  
"Uh huh, just want to get home." Brenna replied tiredly.  
  
Buffy drove as quickly as she could, she sighed at the upholstery in the back seat as she unloaded the little girls. As soon as she settled them in the bath she got the phone and called her pediatrician, he assured her that it seemed to be the virus going around and that they needn't come in unless it got worse.  
  
She hung up the phone and helped the girls out of the tub, getting them into jammies and giving each a popsicle they sat beside her on the couch watching The Littlest Mermaid while she scanned her list of phone numbers for a babysitter.   
  
After several calls she was still emptyhanded, everyone she knew had to work themselves so they couldn't stay home anymore then she could. Sarah and Ellen said they would try to call around for her but they weren't sure if would help or not. Fresh tears stung her eyes as she wondered what to do.  
  
Tierney had fallen asleep against her and Brenna was lying with her head on her mommy's lap almost asleep when the phone rang. Buffy perked up maybe someone had come up with a babysitter for her. She answered the phone, "Hello!"  
  
Spike had stared at the phone for nearly an hour after waking. He wasn't sure if he should just go the park and meet her or go to the house - was he being pushy? A phone call, that wasn't pushy. "It's me, Spike."  
  
He answered.  
  
"Oh, Spike, hi." She sounded off somehow.  
  
"You okay? "   
  
"Well, I thought you might be someone who could babysit for me, the girls are both sick with the stomach virus and they can't go to daycare, all of my friends work and my boss wants me to work late tomorrow for taking off early today. So....I'm not exactly sure what I'm going to do." Her voice caught a little, she chided her self, don't cry to him.  
  
"Buffy, maybe I can help. I'll get my trusty blanket and I'll be over first thing in the morning. You said the girls like me." Spike was suddenly very glad he's called.  
  
"Do you know anything about babysitting? Especially little girls who don't feel well?" Buffy shook her head as she adjusted the phone on her shoulder.  
  
"I'm sure I can do it." Spike argued afterall he was an adult he could sturely care for a couple of kiddies.  
  
"Mommy......" Brenna suddenly sat up from her place on Buffy's lap and began to gag, Buffy's lap caught most of it.  
  
Spike could hear the commotion, "Buffy, you okay?"   
  
"I've got to go, Spike." she told him as she hung up the phone.  
  
Spike grabbed his coat and went to the car. She obviously needed help and he was going to give it to her, whether she wanted it or not.  
  
"I'm sorry, Mommy." Brenna apologized in a weak voice.   
  
"It's okay, sweetie. " Buffy took the little girls hand and after checking that Tierney was still sleeping they made their way to the bathroom. She dampened a washcloth and cleaned the little girls face, thankfully her clothes were still clean unlike Buffy's. "Mom's going to take a bath, okay?" Buffy turned the water on and began to strip out of her dirty clothes, "You can sit right there." She pointed towards the toilet.  
  
"Okay." Brenna sat down while Buffy eased into the tub and cleaned up. Once she was out of the bath she put on an old terrycloth robe, not attractive but very comfy.   
  
"You want to try to eat something, Bren?" Buffy walked into the kitchen, 'Maybe some soup?"  
  
The little girl shook her head no. "How bout another popsicle?" Buffy asked knowing how important it was to keep fluids in the children.  
  
"Okay." Brenna nodded as Buffy opened the freezer door.  
  
"Go check and see if Tierney is awake, she might want another pop too." Buffy asked as she took out the   
  
treat from the freezer.  
  
Brenna found Tierney still asleep but while she was in the living room the doorbell rang. She went to the door and opened it, "Mr. Spike."   
  
"Who is it?" Buffy entered the living room to find Spike standing in the doorway, "Spike, you didn't have to come."  
  
"You sounded like you might need some help." Buffy closed the door and led him into the living room,  
  
"You might not want to get too close, nasty bug they've got."  
  
"I think I'm immune." He laughed softly as he sat down on the end of the couch where Tierney was softly snoring. "  
  
Brenna climbed into her mom's lap and began to lick at her popsicle. "You feeling bad, pet?" Spike smiled at Brenna as she nodded her head and leaned against her mom.  
  
"Would you like me to stay with you tomorrow while mum works?" Spike asked knowing that he was probably pushing his luck.  
  
Buffy raised her eyes at him but Brenna nodded enthusiastically, "Will you read to us?"  
  
"Of course I will." He answered with a wink and a smile.  
  
"Spike, are you sure?" Buffy looked nervous.  
  
"Yeah, I can do this, Buffy. 'Side's what choice do you have? Right now, I'm all you''ve got..." His last words were a de javu' for both of them, he quickly added, "for a babysitter anyway."  
  
She smiled graciously, "Thank you, I'm really not sure what I would have done. The doctor said they would probably be okay by tomorrow evening it's like a twentyfour hour bug. Just have to push fluids, they are running light fevers."  
  
"It's no problem." He turned as Tierney sat up on the couch, rubbing her eyes with small chubby fists, "Hello, there muffin."  
  
Tierney frowned at him, "Not a muffin." She climbed down and went to her mommy.  
  
"She's really cranky when she sick." Buffy explained as the little girl tried to climb into the crowded chair with her mom and sister.  
  
"Brenna, would you like to come over here and get a book."   
  
"Okay." Brenna climbed out Buffy's lap making more room for Tierney. She found a book and handed it to Spike as she climbed up on the couch next to him.  
  
"This looks like a good book." Spike told her as he began to read the first page of Frog and Toad are Friends.  
  
Brenna was explaining the relationship between the two amphibians when she began to turn even paler,   
  
"Momm...." and she began to gag again.   
  
"Bathroom, Spike." Buffy called out as he swooped the little girl into his arms and rushed to the bathroom.  
  
Buffy followed with Tierney on her hip, this time Brenna had made it to the bathroom and was throwing up into the toilet. Spike was on his knees beside the little girl rubbing her back as Buffy reached for another washcloth to dampen.  
  
"You sure you want to do this?" Buffy asked as she began to wash Brenna's face with the cool rag. "Here sweetie, keep this on your forehead you'll feel better."  
  
"Yes, I want to do this, Buffy." He picked up Brenna and they all went back to the livingroom, "Better?"  
  
He asked Brenna as he picked up the book and she lay against him on the couch.  
  
"Better.' The little girl nodded her head. Halfway through the book her eyes began to close within a few minutes she was sleeping, Spike as he covered the little girl with the afghan from the back of the couch.  
  
"You want a popsicle, Tierney?" Buffy asked the small blonde curled in her lap.  
  
"Uh huh."   
  
Buffy stood carrying Tierney with her to the kitchen. She returned shortly the little girl holding a grape popsicle. When she finished the pop it was long before she was sleeping again. "I think it's safe to take them to bed." Buffy stood up, "I'll take her first."  
  
"I'll bring Brenna." Spike told her as he gently gathered the sleeping girl in his arms and followed Buffy to the bedroom. She lay Tierney in her bed as he placed Brenna in hers. Neither girl stirred as the blankets were pulled up around their sleeping forms.  
  
"They'll probably feel better by noon and be driving you nuts." Buffy smiled as she switched on the bedside lamp and turned off the overhead light. "You can back out, I can come up with something."  
  
"I'm not backing out, pet." He assured her as they walked back into the livingroom, "Are you hungry? You haven't eaten anything, been busy with the girls."  
  
"I'm okay." Buffy yawned.  
  
"Let me fix you some soup at least and then I'll be on my way, but I'll be back bright and early." Spike told her as he walked to the kitchen.  
  
"You don't have to cook for me.." Buffy called after him lying back on the couch and closing her eyes, she did feel a bit hungry though, "There' s chicken with stars in the cabinet by the stove."   
  
"Found it." Spike called back as he searched for a pot and can openener.   
  
Soon the soup was simmering and he found a tray to carry it and a glass of juice into the livingroom.  
  
"For you, m'lady." He smiled as she sat up and took the tray.  
  
"I can't remember the last time someone brought me a tray." Buffy smiled at him as she dipped her spoon into the hot soup. "Umm...umm...good." She laughed softly as she finished off the bowl and drank her juice.  
  
"I'll take that and then I'll be on my way." Spike took her tray and the little girls juice cups towards the kitchen.  
  
"You don't have to go." She called after him.  
  
He stopped in his tracks, had she said he didn't have to go, what exactly did she mean? No, Spike she doesn't mean that.....I mean you haven't even discussed feelings....because you love her doesn't mean,  
  
"What?" It came out mumbled.  
  
"You can stay in the guest room, it's not huge but bigger then the closet at Xander's and the bed is much better then that cot in my basment." She yawned again and pulled her robe tighter around her.  
  
"Guest room.....bigger then Xander's closet? That will work, that we won't risk the babysitter exploding into a pile of dust in the morning." He put the dishes in the sink and retunred to find her standing by the couch.  
  
"I'll show you the room, I'm really tired." She showed him to a small room with a double bed and a dresser in it. Like most of the rooms in the house this one also had several family and friends pictures in it. A framed picture of Xander with a dark haired woman he had never seen and two little boys sat on the dresser. More pictures of Willow and Dawn sat beside it. Buffy pulled the bedspread back for him,  
  
"Goodnight, Spike and thank you, I'm not sure what I would have done if you hadnt' been here."  
  
"Your welcome. Sleep tight, Buffy." He told her as she closed the door.  
  
Buffy checked on the girls one more time before retreating to her room, she knew she should probably be a bit worried about leaving the girls with Spike tomorrow but for some reason it felt okay. She let her thoughts linger on the soup he had made for her, it felt good to be the one being taken care of for a change even if only for a little while. She knew she shouldn't read anything into it, Spike was just being Spike he had always been good at taking care of people, he hadn't even mentioned his feelings for her, she supposed that after he had given her up all those years ago that he had moved on, just like he would when his job here was over. She didn't want to think about his leaving not when she had just found him again. Too much thinking Buffy - just go to sleep.  
  
Down the hall, Spike was not faring much better. In the quiet house it was easy for him to hear the three heartbeats and the gentle breathing of the other occupants. Buffy was trusting him with the her daughters that must mean something and the look on her face when he had brought her that tray with a simple bowl of soup. Her face had lit up as if it was steak dinner. She needed to be taken care once in awhile too, such a strong woman. He wondered if he could even dare to hope that she still cared? Too much thinking, Spike. Go to sleep you're gonna need it for tomorrow.  
  
The alarm in Buffy's room went off at 7am she got up and checked the girls then took a leisurely shower, no rushing to get everyone ready this morning. She could hear Spike moving around the house too as she got dressed.  
  
"Good morning." He called to her as she entered the livingroom, "Coffee's made if you'd like some and some toast too?"  
  
"Oh...that sounds great." Buffy smiled as she went to pour herself a cup and sat across from Spike at the small table in the kitchen.  
  
"You want anything with that, I can do eggs." He grinned as he handed her the toast.  
  
"This is good." She smiled at him as she reached for the jelly, "I've got a list of numbers for you, just in case." She handed him a notepad.  
  
"Your work number, doctor's office, poison control, the police, fire department, I don't think we'll need all of these, luv." The familiar endearment slipped out before he realized it, he bit his tongue wishing he hadn't said it. He waited for a look of dissapproval but it never came.  
  
Instead she was still smiling at him, "You never know what could happen. Babysitting is a tough job." She winked at him before she'd realized she'd done it. No, no winking Buffy, no flirting with Spike that can only lead to heartache.....he's leaving soon, just enjoy the time you have.   
  
He raised his eybrow at ther her, "I think the former big bad can handle it." Spike grinned at her, she had winked at him......  
  
"I'm going to check on the girls and then I better go. It's going to be a long day." She sighed as she stood,   
  
"Thanks for the coffee and the toast."  
  
"No problem."  
  
Buffy stepped softly into the girls room they were both still sleeping and she didnt' want to disturb them, kissing each of their foreheads she left the room and gathered her purse and jacket. "They'll probably sleep a bit longer, Spike. Thanks again." She called out as she closed the door and went to her car.  
  
The car smelled when she opened the door - it smelled badly. She'd forgotten to clean the carseats after last nights incident. She took both seats out of the car and quickly hosed them off leaving them to dry outside.   
  
*****  
  
"Your welcome!" He called out as he heard her words of thanks and the door closing.  
  
Spike washed up the few dishes in the sink and noticed the trash can was full so he pulled out the bag and tied it sitting it by the backdoor. After pouring himself a cup of coffee he went into the livingroom and turned on the tv for some lame talkshow watching. He was soon interrupted by the sound of small feet padding down the hallway, "I'm hungry." Brenna called out as she came to stand by the couch.  
  
"Feeling better, little bit?" Spike asked with a smile.  
  
"Yep, where's mommy?" She looked around the room.  
  
"She went to work, remember last night, I told I would be babysitting today?" He stood and she followed him to the kitchen, "What would you like for breakfast?"  
  
"I want some toast and fruitloops." She told him as she climbed up on a chair and put her elbows on the table watching him pop the bread into the toaster and search for the cereal.  
  
"It's in that cabinet, the milk is in there," she pointed at the refrigerator.  
  
"Thank you." He smiles at her and waggles his eyebrows at her before opening the fridge door.  
  
Her laughter is precious , "You're funny, Mr. Spike."  
  
"So are you munchkin." He notices that they are low on milk and cheese. Maybe later if the girls are up to it they'll go get some groceries, Buffy might not like it but at least that would be one less worry for her. He sat the bowl of fruit loops on the table in front of Brenna and handed her a spoon, he sat the toast beside the bowl.  
  
Spike spied a grocery list pad on hanging on the front of the refrigerator a small pencil is attached. He took the pad and sat down across from Brenna. "Let's make a grocery list, what do you and Tierney like to eat?"  
  
"Fruit loops and poptarts. Ice cream and cookies and fruit roll ups. Juice and Sprite." She began to recite her favorite foods.  
  
"How bout lunch foods?"   
  
"Skettio's and wavioli's and noodles. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Tierney like's fluff on her's though." Brenna explained around a mouthful of cereal.  
  
"Fluff?" Spike raised his eyes questioningly.  
  
Before she could answer they were interupted by a shrill voice, "Brenna!!!" Tierney entered the kitchen yelling for her sister.  
  
"Hungry, bit?"   
  
Tierney nodded as she climbed into the chair with the booster seat. "Juice."   
  
"Here you go." Spike sat down a glass of orange juice in front of her, "Cereal too?"  
  
She nodded again. "Not much of a morning person are you? You feeling better."  
  
She nodded again and gave him a small smile as she took a sip of her juice. He sat her cereal in front of her and watched her begin to eat. She and Brenna giggled about something as he finished his list. They went to watch cartoons as Spike cleaned the breakfast dishes. He joined them in the livingroom and smiled as they crawled up on either side of him on the couch. After a couple hours they were both sleeping again, he supposed they were still tired from being sick the night before. He got up and let them lay on the couch. The phone rang and he answered it quickly so it wouldn't wake them, "Hello."  
  
"Spike, it's me. How are the girls doing?" Buffy asked as she drank a soda and opened a bag of chips.  
  
"They're napping right now. I fed them breakfast, we watched cartoons and then they fell asleep."  
  
"Wow, I can have a hard time getting them to nap." She shook her head in amazement.  
  
Spike laughed, "I think they're still tired from being sick, don't think it was me......unless I just bored them to sleep."  
  
She laughed soflty, "Spike, you may be lots of things but boring....never. I've got to go back to work. Thanks again."  
  
He grinned widely into the phone, she thinks I'm never boring....." Oh, Buffy, later when it gets dark, if the girls are up to it, I was going to take them out for a bit. Is that okay?"  
  
"Uh.....where?"   
  
"You're out of milk, thought I'd go get some."   
  
"I can get it on my way home." Buffy suggested unsure of what he was up to.  
  
"Well they might want some before then, you're gonna be late. I'll be careful." Spike assured her.  
  
"Okay, the car seats are sitting outside the garage, I had to clean them this morning. Make sure they stay in them and don't let them talk you into buying hordes of candy."   
  
"Alright,. See you tonight." He hung up the phone, he'd won this round.  
  
The girls slept for an hour giving Spike time to catch Jerry Springer. Brenna woke up first with Tierney shortly following, he read half of the bookshelf before feeding them sandwiches for lunch, They were feeling back to their normal selves by the afternoon and giggled as they built a castle with the sofa pillows and watched a Disney movie from safe within it's walls, until the bleach blond tummy tickler dragon attacked. The living room was full of laughter and Spike thought that he could very well get used to that sound.  
  
As dusk approached Spike had Brenna find clothes for she and Tierney. They dressed and made sure they had pottied before they left. Spike walked the girls out to the car and put in the car seats, he made sure they were safely buckled in and then went in search of a grocery. A few blocks down he pulled into the parking lot of a Kroger and helped the kids from the car. The girls were loaded into a buggy and he pulled the list from his pocket.   
  
He picked up the necessities first, milk, bread, eggs, butter and such. Fresh fruits and veggies were next and cereal and strawberry poptarts. The girls picked out their favorite canned pastas and soups and talked him into goldfish crackers and chocolate chip cookie and he discovered what fluff was as he put the jar of marshmallow creme in the cart.  
  
He then went to the ice cream aisle and scanned the freezer shelves, he was looking for , aha there it was mint chocolate chip ice cream, he remembered that Buffy really liked this or she used to. He picked up an quart of the ice cream and then let the girls choose some ice cream pops.  
  
Brenna held the ice cream and Tierney held the goldfish crackers. They put them on the checkout counter and smiled at the checker, "Hello, aren't you two pretty little girls? I bet your daddy is proud of you."  
  
"Daddy is in heaven." Brenna stated matter of factly. The little girl had no real memories of her daddy, only the pictures around the house and her mom's explanation that her daddy loved her but he got sick and went to heaven.  
  
The checker shrugged her shoulders in apology at Spike.  
  
"I'm not their daddy, I'm just the babysitter." Spike tried to explain as he paid for the groceries.  
  
The woman behind him in line grinned appreciatively, "Wish my babysitter looked like you."  
  
Spike muttered a "Thanks, let's go" And pushed the full buggy to the car.   
  
Brenna was looking at him curiously, "Mr. Spike..."  
  
"Yes, Brenna, sweet."   
  
She looked at him her brow wrinkling between her eyes as if she was in serious thought, "You could be..."  
  
"I could be what, honey?" He asked as he put Tierney in her seat.  
  
"You could be our daddy." Brenna answered as she climbed into the car seat.  
  
Spike wasn't sure what to say, honesty seemed to be the best policy, "That might be nice Brenna, but I don't know how your mom would feel about that. Right now it's nice being friends."  
  
"Friends.........but a daddy would be good now." She chewed on her bottom lip as she mulled this over and more then ever she reminded him of her mother.  
  
TBC 


	3. part three

Spike unpacked the groceries and put them in the cabinet hoping he put them in the right place. Brenna and Tierney helped by telling him that the milk and cheese and orange juice went in the refrigerator and the ice cream in the freezer. He smiled and listened as Brenna explained that ice cream could melt. They were good little girls, smart girls. Brenna's question about him being their new daddy had thrown him for a loop. But the more he thought about it, the more he realized that he liked that idea as much as she did. He needed to come clean with Buffy about everything and hope that she was willing to give him his umpteenth chance.  
  
***  
  
Buffy looked at the small clock on her desk, just thirty minutes more and she could leave, it had been a very long day. Mr. Brannon seemed to keep finding more filing and typing for her to do. She sighed as she finished the last letter he had given her.   
  
"Buffy?"   
  
She looked to see her boss at the door. Mr. Brannon was a nice looking man with a reputation as a womanizer, lately he had been showing more interest in her and it made her nervous. He walked into the office with a bag of Chinese food in his hand and pulled up a chair next to the desk. " I ordered in some food for us. I hope you like chinese."  
  
"That was nice of you sir, but I really need to finish up and go on home to my girls." She smiled pleasantly at him.  
  
"Call it a night, eat with me and then you can go." He began to pull plates and utensils from the bag,  
  
"By the way how are the girls?"  
  
"There much better but I really need to get home to them." Buffy started to stand but he placed his hand on her arm.  
  
"Please, just have a bite, then you can go."   
  
Buffy sighed and sat down again as he pushed a plate of food to her; she gave a half smile as she took a bite of sweet and sour chicken. "It's good."  
  
"Yeah, this place has the best food. We should go there in person some night. or maybe even this weekend?" He suggested with a wink.  
  
"Well.....I have plans this weekend." Buffy began to think of a good excuse.  
  
"Another time then, I think I may need you to work some more late nights." He picked at his food.  
  
"Yes sir, let me know when." She quickly finished her food, "Thanks for dinner." She told him as she gathered her purse and left him in the office. She could feel his eyes watching her as she left.  
  
**  
  
The girls finished there "paschetti and meatballs" and kept Spike company as he cleaned up and put the leftovers away for Buffy.  
  
"Can we read now?" Brenna asked as he shut the fridge door.  
  
"Yes, go get a book." He told her as he followed them to the living room they had just sat down when Buffy came through the door.  
  
"Mommy!!" Both girls cried out as they left the couch to run greet her.  
  
"Brenna! Tierney!" She called out their names and laughed, "Were you good girls?"  
  
"Uh huh." Brenna answered, "We went to the store with Mr. Spike."  
  
"Did you get some milk?" Buffy asked as picked Tierney up.  
  
"Yep, and lots of other stuff." Brenna smiled.  
  
"Ice cream." Tierney added with a giggle.  
  
"Spike?" Buffy turned to him.  
  
"What? It wasn't hordes of chocolate." He smirked. "There's leftover spaghetti in the kitchen."  
  
"I ate but thank you." Buffy sat down with Tierney, "My boss brought in some chinese. I was ready to go but he insisted."  
  
"He insisted?" Spike's voice grew concerned.  
  
"Nothing I can't handle, Spike." She gave him a warning with her eyes, "I'm a big girl."  
  
"I know you can." He put the book back on the shelf, "I guess I better get going. I'll talk to you soon."  
  
"You don't have to rush." Buffy smiled at him, "Stay, have some ice cream."  
  
"I suppose I could do that." He grinned.  
  
"Yeah!" Brenna took him by the hand, "Ice cream and then you can read some more."  
  
"Mr. Spike can't stay just to keep you entertained, Brenna." Buffy teased her daughter, "He probably has to do some actual work or his boss will make him work late."  
  
"I kiind of need to talk to you about that." Spike took a deep breath.  
  
"Your work?" Buffy asked as she led them to the kitchen and began to get out the bowls and spoons.  
  
"My boss, actually." Spike opened the freezer and pulled out both quarts of icecream.  
  
"Oh, mint chocolate chip! My favorite." Buffy squealed happily.  
  
"I thought it was." Spike replied as he helped her dish out the icecream and get the little girls settled at the table.  
  
"So, what about your boss?" Buffy asked as she took a spoonful of ice cream in her mouth, she let the mint and the chocolate roll around on her tongue, "Mmmm."  
  
"You...umm...know him." Spike watched her expression carefully as he ate his own ice cream.  
  
"I do?" She stopped the spoon midway to her mouth.  
  
"I work for Angel in LA."   
  
"You what?" Her face fell with realization.  
  
"I work for Angel. Let me explain." He started but was quickly interrupted.  
  
"There's nothing to explain, Spike. Angel knows I'm here - Giles keeps in touch with him and lets me know how he is too. Does Giles know you're alive? Does everyone but me know?" Her voice was shaky as she tried to stay calm, Brenna and Tierney were looking at her now.  
  
"Mommy?" Brenna asked her eyes wide, "Are you mad at Mr. Spike?"  
  
"No, sweetie, I'm just a little upset about something. You don't need to worry about it." She glared at Spike over her spoon.  
  
"It's not like that Buffy, well, Angel knew but no one else, well Dawn knows she saw me in LA but I didn't see her. She went to Angel- said you needed someone now." He knew he wasn't explaining this well and her face showed not only anger but hurt now too.  
  
"I think you should probably go now, thank you for taking care of the girls and the groceries, I'll pay you for them on payday if you're still in town or I can send a check to Angel's for you.." Buffy 's voice was calm as she put her still half full icecream bowl in the sink.  
  
"You didn't finish your ice cream, mommy." Tierney watched her mommy.  
  
"I'm not hungry for it anymore."   
  
"Buffy, please let me explain." Spike stood and put his bowl in the sink.  
  
"Not now, please go." She could feel the tears stinging her eyes.  
  
"Fine, I'll talk to you later then. Bye girls." He knelt down by Brenna as she gave him a hug, then turned to Tierney as she put her chubby arms around his neck.  
  
"Bye, Mr. Spike." They spoke in unison.  
  
"Finish your ice cream and I'll see Mr. Spike out." Buffy gave the girls a half hearted smile as she left the kitchen.  
  
Spike grabbed his coat and tried one more time, "Buffy please listen to me."  
  
"I said I'd get you that grocery money, go have a good life." Her voice was cold.  
  
"I don't want your damn money, I want you to listen to me. It looks bad, I know that ,but Buffy I'm here now and I really don't want to leave." His voice rose slightly.  
  
"Keep your voice down, the girls don't need to hear this. You say you want to stay, well I've heard that before from you, from Angel, from Riley, from poor David who really didn't have a choice. The only reason you're here now is out of pity, Angel heard poor Buffy needed help so he sent you here, if Dawn had never seen you - you would have never come would you? You would have never looked for me at all?" Her voice was rising now and she was doing her best to lower it and keep the tears from flowing.  
  
"I think of you everyday, Buffy. Your picture is on my dresser, I talk to it like some lovestruck fool, I never stopped thinking about you. I asked Angel if you were happy, if you were okay, and he's always assured me you were so I thought it was best to leave it. Angel didn't know about your husband." Spike was getting desperate, "He didn't know....I would have come sooner if I'd known you were alone all this time."  
  
"I don't believe that Angel didn't know about David's death. Giles talks to him , he even told me that Angel sent his condolences. I should have talked to Angel myself but after I married it seemed best to just go through Giles. So I'm sorry, I don't know why he decided to send you now, Dawn must have guilted him into it. But I'm not anyone's pity case." She gritted her teeth, "Please go now."  
  
"Buffy...I." Spike could tell it was useless, "Goodbye." The word was a desperate whisper.  
  
"Mr. Spike!" Brenna yelled from the kitchen doorway, "Will you come read to me again,  
  
tomorrow?." Tierney joined her nodding her head in approval of her sister's question.  
  
Spike looked from the little girl to her mother. Buffy spoke, "Mr. Spike is leaving to go back to his home, he won't be back."  
  
Spike shook his head sadly, "I'm sorry Brenna." He opened the front door and let himself out.  
  
"Mommy - you made him go away! Now he can't ever be my daddy." Brenna ran down the hall to her room crying, her sister following her.  
  
Buffy started after her as the phone rang, she stopped to pick it up, "Hello, I'm sorry but I can't talk right now."  
  
"Buffy, don't hang up, it's me, Dawn. "  
  
"Dawn! Thanks so much for all you've done. I have to go now, I'll call you back" Buffy replied before she hung up the phone.  
  
Dawn heard the phone slam down, the dialtone blared in her ear, "What could have gone wrong?."  
  
"Brenna, Tierney,girls I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you." Buffy sat down on the bed between the girls.  
  
"You made him go away, we liked him." Brenna explained through her tears.  
  
"I know you did. But there are things that big people understand that little girls don't. Mr. Spike had to go home." Buffy pushed Brenna's soft brown hair off of her face.  
  
"But he liked me, he could have been my daddy." Brenna frowned at Buffy.  
  
Those words hit Buffy hard, memories surfaced from long ago, in another time, in another place, if things had been different, he might have been her daddy. She shook her head to get rid of these very unwanted thoughts.  
  
Buffy wasn't exactly sure how to handle this daddy talk, Brenna had never really mentioned wanting a daddy before, she knew her daddy was in heaven but she had always seemed to accept that. Neither of the girls had been old enough to save memories of their daddy and she regretted that.  
  
"Can he ever come back?" Brenna sniffing.  
  
Buffy hugged both of her daughters close to her, "We'll see. Now lets get out baths and go to bed. It's back to daycare in the morning."  
  
Later that evening when the girls were sleeping, Buffy dialed her sister's number."Dawn, I shouldn't have hung up like that. But you should have never gone to Angel about Spike. It's a mess now." Buffy's voice broke.  
  
"What happened Buffy?" Dawn asked sympathetically.  
  
"He took the girls out for happy meals and he reads to them and he babysat and cooked for them, bought groceries and they love him, already. And then he had the nerve to say that Giles never told Angel that David was sick or anything. That's such bull. He didn't even tell me he worked for Angel till tonight..I'm not going to let my kids get any more attached to him, I'm not gonna let him leave me....I mean leave my kids and hurt them too."  
  
Dawn interrupted this time, "Buffy, he wasn't lying. I don't know why Giles chose not to tell Angel about David's death but he really didn't."  
  
"Why would Giles do that, Dawn? It makes no sense." Buffy began to argue.  
  
"Well if he thought it was in your best interest Buffy....he's been known to make some strange decisions when it comes to you." Dawn sighed into the phone.  
  
"So, Angel really didn't know about everything?" Buffy's voice softened.  
  
"No, he really didn't, he thought you were living a perfect life."  
  
"So, Spike was telling the truth? Still Dawn, he dissappeared from my life, he made decisions for me that he had no right to. And one part of me is so angry about that, the other part wants to thank him for giving me the time with David and my Brenna and Tierney. I am so confused." Buffy took a deep breath, "I suppose I at least owe him an apology."  
  
"I think so." Dawn agreed.  
  
"I'm not sure how to reach him."   
  
"Call Angel and find out where he's staying?" Dawn suggested.  
  
"I'm not up to talking to Angel tonight. I need a couple of days to get myself together." Buffy twisted the phone cord between two fingers.  
  
"Don't wait too long, Buffy. I know this is all sudden, but I need to ask you a question? And I want to preface it by saying that I know you loved David with all your heart and you were loyal and true to him and that you miss him everyday."  
  
"Okay." Buffy murmured into the phone.  
  
"Do you still care for Spike? Given the chance could you love him again?" Dawn went right to the point.  
  
"I.....of course I care. But Dawn, I'm not really sure he still loves me, cares yes, feels the urge to take care of me and the girls ...yes he does, but does he still love me? I don't know. And I'm not sure I can risk my heart or the girls hearts." Buffy chewed on her bottom lip still furiously twisting the phone cord.  
  
"He loves you...Buffy. I know he does. Don't take too long to talk to him, please?" Dawn pleaded with her sister.  
  
"I'll think about it. I'm tired it's been a long day. I'll talk to you soon. Love you." Buffy hung up the phone and got ready for bed. It was going to be a long sleepless night.  
  
****  
  
"Angel, " Spike spoke irritably into the phone, "I've screwed up royally. I told her I worked for you. She put two and two together and came up with Buffy's usual five instead of four so she's sure I'm here out of pity!"  
  
"Maybe it's not so bad as you think, Spike." Angel replied hoping that his words were true.  
  
"Oh, it's that bad, she asked me to leave and she had that patented 'you screwed up big time, vampire' Buffy look on her face and I've seen if often enough to know it by heart." Spike sighed loudly into the reciever.  
  
"So you're going to give up then, come on back to LA?" Angel asked baiting him.  
  
"Well, no....I didn't say that, but I'm at my wits end here. I'm not sure how to make this right."   
  
"You'll think of something, Spike. I know you, you're just as stubborn as she is. Keep me posted." Angel hung up the phone.  
  
Spike paced around the hotel room for an hour before he lie down. He wanted to pick up the phone and call her, try again to make it right. He was sure she would just hang up on him though, he needed to see her in person. He decided to go see her at work tomorrow, he'd looked up where she worked and if he went to see her there, she'd have to listen, she wouldn't want to make a scene. It was a perfect plan, he smiled to himself as he closed his eyes.  
  
TBC 


	4. Part Four

The morning started like most mornings had the last couple of years. She got the children up and dressed and fed and then gets ready for work herself. But this morning her thoughts kept   
  
drifiting back to yesterday morning, there was no rushng, her children got to sleep in without being hauled to daycare and ....and.....Spike had been here. Get over it, Buffy! She grumbled as she ran the brush through her hair. Thoughts of Spike could only lead to heartache.  
  
"Mommy!!!" Tierney ran into the bathroom and clung to Buffy's legs.  
  
Brenna followed fast on her heels, "Give it back, Tierney."   
  
Tierney peeked at her sister from behind Buffy's legs, "No."  
  
"What is it, Brenna?" Buffy tried to remove Tierney's grip from her leg.  
  
"She's got my hair barrette and she won't give it back." Brenna pouted as she stepped towards the younger girl.  
  
"Tierney, let me see?" Buffy knelt beside her daughter she carefully pried open Tierney's fist, and revealed a plain blue barrette. "Let's give this back to Brenna, okay?"   
  
Tierney frowned as Buffy handed the barette to Brenna. "Brenna, you have lots of blue barettes, sweetie, what's so special about this one?"  
  
"Mr. Spike put it in my hair yesterday and he said it made me look smashing, that means pretty." Brenna smiled at her mom.  
  
"Oh, I see. Well, I think any barette you wear makes you look smashing." Buffy teased the little girl and picked up the brush to her her hair, pulling her bangs back with the blue barette. She put on a very happy face but inside it hurt a little, in a matter of days Spike had already made a big impression on her girls. What would happen if she let them spend even more time with him?  
  
Tierney insisted on a blue barrette also, Buffy grinned as she watched the girls walk out to the car, she could never imagine life without them. She buckled them into the seats, "Okay, girls, mommy has to work late tonight, so you'll be with Miss Marie after Miss Jan leaves tonight,okay?"  
  
Marie came in and worked the evening shift at the daycare, the girls weren't as familiar with her as Jan, but they seemed to like her and Buffy felt comfortable with her too. She just hated her girls having to stay late at all.  
  
****  
  
Mr. Brannon popped into her office several times through the morning, he brought her a bagel and sat around chatting for several minutes before his first client showed up. He continued to make Buffy nervous, she hoped by politely declining his invitations he would get the message that she wasn't interested.  
  
At noon Buffy leaned back in her chair, her boss had a lunchtime meeting so she was in the office alone. She opened her diet soda and a bag of pretzels for lunch, the phone rang and she was tempted to let the machine get it, afterall it was technically her lunch. She thought better of it and picked up the phone, "Brannon Law Offices, how may I help you?"  
  
"Buffy?" Spike's voice came through the phone, "Please don't hang up."  
  
"What, Spike? I'm kind of busy here, working you know." She lied as she fished another pretzel from the bag.  
  
"I wanted to come by and see you later, please?" He tried to sound calm.  
  
"Spike, I'm working late and by the time I get the girls home, we won't feel like company." She sighed into the phone, "I really do need to talk to you sometime though, I talked to Dawn...."  
  
"You did?" His voice had that hopeful ring she remembered so well.  
  
"Yes, and she explained a few things, but I'm just not going to be up to going over it tonight, it's already been a long day. Will you be in town tomorrow?"  
  
"Sure, I'll be here as long as you want me to be."   
  
"Spike.....I can't, I mean I.....I'll call you later okay?" She hung up the phone and took a long sip off her coke, so not wanting to have that conversation.  
  
Spike hung up the phone deciding that he couldn't wait until tomorrow, he had waited too long, his decision to never see her again seemed utterly stupid now. Despite the fact that he didn't regret her happy marriage and children and he would have never interfered with that, now that the situation was so different, all it took was one look at her in that park and he knew.....knew he would never stop loving her.   
  
Buffy was well known for procrastinating when it came to emotional confrontations, he wanted to get this all out in the open now. If she was working late he would just swing by there at dusk and see her for a few minutes maybe he could help somehow, possibly pick the girls up from daycare for her, he wasn't going to give up until he made her see that he still cared, still loved her, already loved those little girls.  
  
He showered and dressed and tried to watch tv as he paced the small room waiting for darkness.  
  
Buffy looked at the clock on her desk, 6 o'clock, just one more hour and she could go. Mr. Brannon still had someone in his office and he'd been very busy this afternoon so he had not had much time to bother her. She was grateful for that but her heart sunk when she heard him saying goodbye to the client and heard his footprints heading down the hall towards her office.  
  
"Buffy." He called out as he entered her office, "That's a lovely name......for a lovely lady."  
  
He sat down on the corner of her desk.  
  
***  
  
Spike pulled on his jacket as the sun went down, he grabbed his keys and went to find Buffy's office. It didn't take long and her car was still in the parking lot. "Now or never?" His words seemed loud in the empty car. He parked and got out walking towards the building.  
  
**  
  
"Thank you, Mr. Brannon. Is there something I can help you with?" She smiled nervously as she rearranged some paperwork.  
  
"I think you could probably help me with, " He leaned over the desk his face close to here, "lots of things Buffy. I'm sure you would be a big help at relieving some of my stress." He raised his  
  
eyebrow suggestively.  
  
"Mr. Brannon, I really like my job here and I'm flattered, but... I really don't think it's a good idea ....."  
  
"You don't mix business with pleasure?" He grinned at her.  
  
"No, sir. I don't think thats a good idea." She took a deep breath and stood up behind her desk.  
  
He took her by surprise and lunged over the desk at her trapping her between the wall and the desk, he pressed against her, "It can still be business, Buffy, I'll make sure you're paid for any services you perform."  
  
Buffy's anger flared as he put his hands on her upper arms, she sighed inwardly, I really needed this job was her last thought before she wrenched one arm free and made a fist, she pulled back to hit him, but didn't get the chance.  
  
Spike had entered the room and was roughly pulling Brannon off of Buffy, "I believe the lady was saying no."  
  
He raised his own fist to hit the man but was stopped by Buffy. "Spike, don't. Please." She pleaded hoping she could still get out of this with a job - at least until she could find another.  
  
Brannon looked from Buffy to Spike, "I didn't know she was seeing someone, if she had told me..." Brannon started to explain.  
  
"I'm no...." Buffy started to explain then thought better of it, maybe it was a good thing if he thought she was seeing someone.  
  
"It didn't look like that would have mattered to you." Spike stared at the man icily. "Trust me I know when this woman says no, that's what she means. You can't go around treating women like that. you don't force a woman..." Spike's voice began to lower to an almost whisper.  
  
"It's okay, Spike. I'm okay." Buffy touched his arm.  
  
Brannon sneered at them, "I think you both better leave, Buffy your check will be in the mail tomorrow. Probably wouldn't have been worth the expensive dinner anyway." He snarked as he started to leave the room.  
  
Spike's fist met his face within seconds of the last statement. Brannon reached up to his nose and felt the blood running down his face, he picked up the phone off of Buffy's desk and heaved it at Spike's head, it made contact and soon Spike had blood running down his forehead.  
  
Mr. Brannon quickly exited the room.  
  
Buffy simply gathered her purse and her pictures of her chidren from her desk. Spike was still very quiet as he watched her, "He could have, he was going to...force you."  
  
"I wouldn't have let him, Spike. Come on, let's go, we need to get that cut fixed up." She shook her head as she looked around the office, what was she going to do about a job?  
  
He followed her outside the office, "I'm sorry, I just couldn't let him do......what I almost did." His eyes were filled with horror at the memory from so long ago.  
  
"Spike, it's okay, we aren't going there. If you want to pick at scabs on old wounds you'll have to to do it alone, I'm not going to help. I'm going to get the girls, meet me at my place okay?" She touched his arm again, "I'm okay, jobless but okay."   
  
"I'm sorry, Buffy, I didn't mean to.....I guess I better let you go get the girls. You don't have to worry with the cut, it's nothing."   
  
"Don't be silly, you kind of rescued me so it's the least I can do. The girls will be happy to see you anyway, Brenna was mad at me for sending you away last night." She gave him a small smile.  
  
"She was?" He grinned.  
  
"You know she was, she likes you..... alot." Buffy sighed, "See you in a few minutes."   
  
"Okay, I'll be there." He got into his car, maybe he has chance.  
  
She drove off wondering how quickly she could find another job after this last check she would only have the meager savings in her account to live on.  
  
"You're a little early?" Miss Marie greeted Buffy with the girls at her side.  
  
"Yes, I didn't have to stay as late as I had thought." Buffy explained as she grabbed the girls backpacks.  
  
"Can we go to the park?" Brenna asked as she got in her seat.  
  
"Not tonight, sweetie, it's a little late. But I do have a surprise for you at home." Buffy smiled at the little girls in the rearview mirror.  
  
"Surprise?" Brenna asks with a grin.  
  
"Yay!" Tierney claps her hands.  
  
Buffy pulled up in the driveway and Spike's car wasn't there, where is he? I shouldn't have told the kids they had a surprise, he must have changed his mind she sighed as she parked the car.  
  
"Where is the surprise, mommy?" Brenna wants to know.  
  
"In a minute, sweetie." Buffy puts her off. I'll have to think of something and as she's going over possible surprises in her mind, a car pulls into the driveway.  
  
"Mr. Spike!" Brenna and Tierney call out to him as he exits the car, happy meals in hand.  
  
"Are you our surprise?" Brenna asks him as Buffy looks on, a small smile on her face.  
  
"I guess I am." He smiles at Buffy over the girls heads, "And I brought dinner." He waved the McDonald's bags at the girls.  
  
"Mr. Spike....your blooding on your head." Brenna notes with a frown, "You need some bactine and a bandaid."  
  
"It's okay, Brenna. I'm gonna fix him up." Buffy answerrf for him.  
  
"Good." Brenna took one of the small bags from him.  
  
"Nuggets?" Tierney questions him.  
  
"Yes, sweet bit, it's nuggets."   
  
She gave him her biggest smile and takes the other bag walking towards the house.  
  
"You learned what makes them happy pretty quickly." Buffy raised her eyebrow at him.  
  
"They're pretty easy to please. Thier mom is the hard one." He teased her as they walked into the house.  
  
"Mommy is going to fix Mr. Spike's cut and then we'll be right back. " Buffy told the girls as she settled them at the table with their food.  
  
  
  
Spike followed her into the living room, "I'll be right back with the first aid kit and we'll get you fixed up."  
  
He waited for her on the couch, she sat down next to him and lay out her supplies, she dabbed at the cut with an alcohol soaked cotton ball. He winced, "I thought Brenna said bactine?"   
  
She rolled her eyes at him, "Are you four years old?"  
  
He sighed, "Just saying."  
  
She put the bandaid on and absently ran her hand through his hair pushing a random girl back off of his forehead. She quickly tried to pull her hand back when she'd realized what she had done.  
  
He reached for her hand before she could pull it away from him and looked into her eyes, "Buffy, we have to talk." His hand gently held hers, " I Iove you. I always have and always will. If you don't feel the same way, if you don't think you can ever feel that way, it's okay, I understand."  
  
"Spike...I don't know.......I've got the girls to worry about now. What if somewhere down the line you decide it's in their best interest that you leave? You can't go around breaking children's hearts...if it was just me, it would be different...." Buffy's voice was full of conflicting emotions.  
  
"I'm not going to hurt you or those girls. I already love them, they're a part of you. I want to take care of all of you. I want to make up for all the hurt you've been through." He squeezed her hand tightly.  
  
"You're here and part of me just wants to let you take care of me, but a very large part of me is scared to let anyone take care of me again." Her brow furrowed as she thought things over.  
  
"Would you be willing to at least give me a chance to prove to you that I'm going to stick around this time. I'm not going anywhere." His eyes and his voice were full of sincerity.  
  
"How about your job in LA?" Buffy raised her eyebrows at him questioningly, "You already have to leave if you're going back to work."  
  
"I'm gonna talk to Angel, he's talked about a second office. Doesn't matter I've got money saved and I can find something here."   
  
She couldn't hide her surprise, "You...you want to move here?"  
  
"If thats what it takes, I want to be where you are, where Brenna and Tierney are. I'd move to Alaska if that's what you wanted ." He smiled at her, she seemed to be warming up some.  
  
"The girls feelings would have to come first, we would have to be very careful with them." Buffy's lip began to tremble, she couldn't believe she was even contemplating this.  
  
"Of course, the girls are the priority here." He agreed with her.  
  
"And it has to be slow, Spike. We aren't good with the rushing in." She warned solemnly.  
  
"Slow, we can go slow." He was almost afraid to answer, afraid she might change her mind.  
  
"Okay, then." She nodded her head and gathered up the first aid supplies.  
  
"Okay." He agreed as she stood beside her, "I think I owe the girls a book and when I've read it I'll go. Give you a bit of time to think, is that slow enough?"   
  
She smiled at him, "I think that will work."   
  
He then leaned over and placed a gentle, barely there kiss on her forehead, "Been wanting to do that since I saw you in the park."  
  
She laughed softly as she raised her face to his for a real kiss, lips barely brushed against each other when they were interrupted by peals of giggling.   
  
"Tierney!" Brenna was calling her sister, "Come here....Mr. Spike and mommy kissed!"  
  
TBC 


	5. part five

A/N: This will probably be the last part for a little while, my daughter's wedding is June 21rst. So I am busy, busy ~ Andra  
  
Buffy pulled away from Spike and faced Brenna who was now pointing at Buffy and Spike as Tierney came to stand beside her. Tierney was grinning now, "Kiss?"   
  
Brenna nodded her head enthusiastically, "Brenna, you are so silly, come here you two." She knelt down on the floor and held her arms out for the girls to come give her a hug.  
  
"Mr. Spike kissed you, mommy." Brenna mumbled from her place pressed against her moms shoulder peeking at Spike standing close by, she grinned at him.  
  
"Yes, he did." Buffy pulled the little girl back a bit and looked in her eyes, "Is that okay?"  
  
"Uh huh!" Brenna nodded.  
  
"And you, sweet bit?" Spike asked Tierney as he knelt beside them.  
  
"Um huh." Tierney grinned as she wrapped chubby arms around his neck.  
  
"Then it's settled." He smiled and winked at Buffy.  
  
"Well, at least part of it." Buffy grinned back, "Now, I guess we should all go finish supper."  
  
Brenna took one of her mom's hand and Tierney took the other. As Spike walked behind them he was glad that unlike Angel his soul was anchored, because as Brenna looked over her shoulder at him and offered her free hand, he was sure that classified as a moment of true happiness. He grasped her small hand in his and walked to the kitchen.  
  
"Here is a salad for mommy." Spike took the grilled chicken salad from the bag," and a burger for me."  
  
"Come on girls, you need to finish your food." Buffy encouraged them as she sat down next to Spike and began to eat her salad.  
  
"Finish it all and we'll read a book before I have to go."   
  
"Goodie!" The girls called out and began to finish their meals.  
  
Spike watched them with a smile on his face, he'd never thought much about children, but these two had certainly claimed his heart already. He glanced at Buffy who was watching him interact with the girls and grinning, that had to be a good sign.  
  
"Okay, I'll clean this up and you can go listen to a story." Buffy told them as she began to clear the table.  
  
Spike and the girls headed into the livingroom where they chose a book, Buffy could hear his comforting voice in the kitchen and it made her feel safe and warm. Sure she had to hit the streets tomorrow for a job search, but now listening to Spike reading a Winnie the Pooh book and her girls sweet giggles was enough to make her happier then she had been in a long while.  
  
"The End." Spike's words signaled the end of the book.  
  
"Now it's time for little girls to go get ready for a bath." Buffy called from the kitchen doorway where she was leaning watching them.  
  
"Mommy!" Brenna whined.  
  
"Brennnnnnnnaaa" Buffy whined back at her, "go and get your jammies laid out and I'll be in to run your bathwater in a few minutes."  
  
"Okay, bye Mr. Spike." Brenna called to him as she left the room.  
  
"Bye, Mr. Spike." Tierney copied her sister as she followed her down the hallway.  
  
"I think that's my cue to leave." He stood and reached for his coat.  
  
"I better get some sleep tonight, it's job hunting Buffy tomorrow. At least I'm paid till tomorow on daycare." She sighed and suddenly leaned into his chest resting her head there.  
  
He was happily surprised at her action and promptly began to run his hand over her hair, "I'm sorry about that."  
  
"It really wasn't your fault, I would have hit him anyway." She giggled softly against him and it sent a shiver through him.  
  
"I better go." He pulled away from her and grinned, "Can Mr. Spike kiss mommy again?"  
  
"He better." She returned his grin before he leaned towards her and this time lips parted, and they explored each other as if it was the first time, yet something so familiar brought back a flood of passionate memories for both.  
  
Buffy finally pulled away to breathe, "Wow!"  
  
"Yeah, wow!" He agreed, "Now, I'm leaving or I'll never go."  
  
"Come by tomorrow night and I'll let you know how the job hunting went." She walked him to the door her hand clasping his hesitant to let go of him.  
  
"See you then, good luck. I'm going to start looking for a place tonight."   
  
"That sounds good." She let go of his hand, "Talk to you soon."  
  
He leaned over and kissed her forehead, "Goodnight."  
  
She stood at the door and watched him leave. Her silent reverie was interrupted by the sound of bathwater running. She ran down the hallway and found the girls in the bathroom. "Let me adjust that water for you, you could get burned." She scolded them.  
  
"Like mommy?" Brenna asked as she pulled the bubble bath from under the sink.  
  
"Like mommy." Buffy looked down at the faint white burn scars on her hand,another memory from long ago, "Now lets get you two in the tub."  
  
****  
  
Morning came bright and early, Buffy hit the off button on the alarm and lay in the bed for a few moments. She was going to drop the girls at daycare and start combing the want ads for a job. She sighed as she went to shower, job hunting was never fun.  
  
"Jan, today will probably be the girls last day for awhile, I...I kind of lost my job, so I'm looking for a new one today." Buffy explained as she handed the girls backpacks to the daycare owner.  
  
"I'm sorry to hear that, Buffy. It's none of my business but did Jim Brannon try anything with you?" Jan asked a frown on her face.  
  
Buffy flushed slightly and nodded in affirmation.  
  
"I don't know how you lasted that long with him, he has a terrible reputation." Jan smiled at Buffy, "But his loss may be my gain."  
  
Buffy looked confused, "Pardon?"  
  
"Lydia who runs the office for the daycare is moving at the end of next week, so I have a secretarial position open." The older woman smiled.  
  
"Really? I'd love that!" Buffy grinned.  
  
"I don't think I can pay as much as Brannon did, but, there are some perks to working here, for instance, your children's daycare is free." Jan led Buffy into a small office.  
  
"That would be wonderful, Jan." Buffy fought back a tear, maybe things were going to be better.  
  
"This is Lydia and she'll start training you on Monday if that's okay?" Jan gestured towards a pretty girl sitting at the desk.  
  
"I'd be happy to train you." Lydia smiled.  
  
"Let's get some details worked out and then I'll see you Monday." Jan offered Buffy a chair.   
  
Buffy left the daycare feeling lighter, she had a job and she could be near her children. What could be more perfect? She wanted to share her good news and even though it was still early she found herself on the road to the hotel where Spike was staying. She parked in front of the hotel hesitating for a few moments before getting out the car and walking to his room.   
  
Spike was startled from his sleep by a soft knocking on his room door, pushing the covers aside he called out sleepily, "Be right there." He pulled on a pair of sweat pants and went to the door he opened it cautiously, "Buffy?" He opened the door a bit wider and let her in.  
  
"Sorry to wake you." She suddenly felt quite shy as she stared at his bare chest, "I should go, let you rest."  
  
"No, I needed to get up anyway. I found some apartments to look at in the paper last night, need to call to make some appointments for tonight. Is everything okay? The girls?" He asked concern heavy in his voice.  
  
"The girls are good, I'm good, in fact I have good news. I've already found a job!"   
  
"Tell me all about it, sit." He patted the bed beside him.  
  
She sat down and excitedly explained about the job. He listened to her every word smiling at ther excitement, "That's perfect for you."  
  
"Yes, it is. I just feel so good, like everything is going right for a change." She took his hand in hers, "Thank you."  
  
"Me? You did this on your own." He rubbed his thumb across her knuckle staring at her beautiful, scarred hand. Scarred hand? "Buffy, how, when did this happen?" He held her hand up looking at the pale scars.  
  
"That night, Spike. When I took your hand in mine, funny I saw the flames, but I didn't feel them. I didn't even realize I was burned till hours later." She gave him a half smile.  
  
"I guess we both have scars from that night," He held out his own hand for her.  
  
Buffy took a closer look at his hand, it held pale scars matching her own, "You kept the scars even after you came back?"  
  
"Yeah, the one above my eye and these on my hand." He shrugged,"don't know why."  
  
"I kept wanting to believe that you survived somehow, I missed you for so long." She leaned back against the headboard.  
  
"I missed you too, all these years, I thought about you everyday." He stretched out on the bed beside her tilting his head so that it touched hers ever so lightly. He reached for her scarred hand and held it tightly in his own. "You said something to me yesterday about not picking at old wounds. Do you really think we can do that?" He brought her hand to his lips   
  
and placed a kiss in her palm.  
  
"Honestly I don't know....." She squeezed his hand, "I do know that I want to try though. Are you sure you're ready to take on the girls? I'm a package deal now you know."  
  
"Terrifies me , but that's nothing new." He smiled as he put his hand to her cheek, "But it's going to be worth it."  
  
"So I still have the ability to terrify you, that's something." She leaned over and placed a light kiss on his lips.  
  
The kiss grew in it's intensity within minutes, as hands roamed freely, small sighs escaped from them both as they lost themself in the moment. Spike sighed loudly and pulled away suddenly.  
  
"What?" Buffy asked worry shone in her face.  
  
"As much as I would love to finish this," he raised his eyebrow at her meaningfully, "I....I want to to do this properly, no rushing just like you said last night. We know we're good at this part of a relationship, lets give ourselves time to get good at the other parts." He held his non breath waiting for her reply.  
  
She smiled the sweetest smile then, "You mean that don't you?"  
  
"Yeah, I do. Gonna do it right this time." He disentangled himself from her and stood up.  
  
"Thank you...for caring so much." She kissed his cheek, " I noticed that the fair is starting tonight, would you like to go with the girls and I. It's not much of a date but....it could be fun." She stood up and reached for her purse.  
  
"I'd love that, I'll come by at dark." He walked her to the door, kissing her briefly before closing it behind her. A smile lit his face.  
  
Spike spent the afternoon on the phone with realtors and apartment managers, he had found two places close to Buffy and had appointments the next evening to see them. He had also circled another listing in the paper, a four bedroom with a large yard, he knew they were taking it slow, but as soon as he had seen the ad he knew he had to at least see it.  
  
Buffy went home to make some phone calls, first to Dawn who was very excited to hear that she was giving Spike a chance. The second was a call she dreaded to make but she had to have some answers from him, she dialed Gile's number nervously. After three rings his machine picked up, she left him a message, "Giles, this is Buffy. I need to talk to you. I'll call back tomorrow."  
  
She picked the girls up from daycare and let them in on the plans for the fair. They giggled with excitement all the way home. "Let's have a quick supper and then you can have dessert at the fair!"  
  
"What kind of dessert?" Brenna asked as she finished her sandwich and milk.  
  
"Candied apples, cotton candy, funnel cake or kettle corn. Lots of good stuff." Buffy answered as she cleaned up Tierney's face.  
  
"Tierney let's go change your clothes you have kool aid on your shirt." Buffy led the little girl out of the kitchen in time to get the door.  
  
"Are we ready for the fair?" Spike asked as he entered the house.  
  
"Yep!" Tierney grinned at him, "Candy apples."  
  
Brenna came into the living room chanting, "We're going to the fair!"  
  
"I told them they could have dessert at the fair." Buffy explained as she took Tierney's hand, "I've got to go change her shirt before we go, I'll be right back."  
  
Brenna sat beside Spike on the couch, "Have you been to a fair before?"  
  
"Yes, I've been to lots of fairs. Have you been to a fair before?"   
  
"I don't 'member, maybe when I was little." Brenna told him with a grin.  
  
"Oh, that long ago, huh?" He laughed softly.  
  
Brenna nodded her head and smiled, "Mommy says it's lots of fun."  
  
The phone rang and Buffy called from the bedroom, "Spike, could you please get that?"  
  
"Sure." He called back as he picked up the phone, "Hello."  
  
There was no answer on the other end, "Hello." Spike repeated.  
  
"With whom am I speaking?" The caller asked.  
  
"Who do you think it is, Rupert?" Spike answered with a smirk.  
  
"It can't be who I think it is, he's dead...has been for years." Giles sighed loudly into the phone.  
  
"Funny thing about that." Spike began to speak but was soon interrupted by Buffy returning to the room.  
  
"Who is it?" She asked as she sat Tierney on the couch and began to change her shoes.  
  
"Giles." He handed her the phone and took over shoe duty.  
  
"Giles, this is Buffy."  
  
"Buffy, was that really Spike? Is that why you needed to talk to me? How..when..how is he there?"  
  
Giles strung the questions together.  
  
"Yes it's Spike. He really is here, and yes, that's partly why I needed to talk to you. But mainly I wanted to know why you've been lying to Angel all these years. You let him believe that David was still alive, that we were living happily ever after. Why, Giles?" Buffy's voice broke softly.  
  
"It was for you, dear. As long as Angel thought you were happy, he stayed away, if he had known that you were widowed he would have felt like he had to come and help you. You don't need Angel in your life again and you most definitely don't need Spike in it! Have you learned nothing, Buffy?"  
  
Giles sighed again and reached for his glasses.  
  
Buffy could almost hear him cleaning his glasses, "So it was you trying to teach me another lesson, like when you and Wood set up Spike to kill him for my own good? I believe that was before he sacrificed himself to save us all, wasn't it?"  
  
"Buffy, I do realize that he did sacrifice himself, but that does not mean he is any better for you now than he was then. I realize you have a soft spot for him but really you have the girls to think about now." Giles tried to reason with her.  
  
"The girls already love him, he reads to them and really listens when they talk to him. This is my decision to make, Giles. I can't talk to you now, I'm taking the girls to the fair."   
  
"With Spike?" Giles asked dissproval in his voice.  
  
"Yes, with Spike. I'll talk to you later." She hung up the phone and swallowed the lump in her throat. Why couldn't he understand?   
  
TBC 


	6. part six

Spike placed his hand on Buffy's shoulder as she hung up the phone, "You okay, luv?"  
  
"No, but I will be." Buffy tried to smile, "I'll sort it out with him later, now...now we have a fair to go to."  
  
"You sure?" He asked as Tierney lifted her arms up to him to be picked up.  
  
"Very." She took Brenna's hand in hers and they went to the car.  
  
The Fair was bustling with people and activity when they arrived. The girls eyes grew wide at the sight of the rides and the sound of the fair workers voices as they called out to come play their games of chance. Giant stuffed animals hung from rope strung around the booths. The wonderful scent of Fair food hung heavy in the air.  
  
The Merry Go Round seemed to jump out at them as they turned a corner, Brenna pointed at it excitedly, "Look at the horses!"  
  
Buffy grinned, "Let's get some tickets and we'll ride it."  
  
"You want to ride that one, too?" Spike asked Tierney from her perch in his arms, she nodded her head enthusiastically. He pulled out his wallet and handed several bills to Buffy, "Get lots of tickets!" He grinned.  
  
Buffy grinned back, "Thanks." She went to the small booth and was soon back with a handful of tickets.   
  
They went to stand in the short line at the Merry Go Round, Brenna bounced up and down excitedly, "I want to ride the white horse." She watched as a white horse with purple and pink flowers in it's mane passed round and round in front of them.  
  
"Alright, we'll try to get that one just for you." Buffy smiled brightly, the earlier conversation with Giles forgotten for the moment.  
  
The ride stopped and the group handed their tickets to the man and began to board the ride,  
  
Buffy helped Brenna on to her horse and took the one beside it. Spike climbed on a larger black horse behind them, Tierney firmly placed in front of him, she held on tightly to the pole in front of her.  
  
The music started and the horses began to move up and down, round and round. Spike frowned at the choice of music, this was Tennessee though, there was going to be country music at a fair. As he watched Buffy and Brenna giggling in front of him and Tierney laughing happily as she leaned back against him, he listened to the words...  
  
"I will give you my heart  
  
Faithful and true  
  
And all the love it can hold  
  
That's all I can do  
  
But I've thought about  
  
How long I'll love you  
  
And it's only fair that you know  
  
Forever's as far as I'll go."  
  
Not a bad thought he nodded to himself as Buffty turned around and flashed him a smile. Not a bad thought at all.  
  
The ride began to slow down and the music stoppped. Spike climbed down from his horse with Tierney in tow. Buffy helped Brenna off of her horse and they went in search of another ride. Brightly painted lady bugs going in circles weren't too far away and they found themselves standing in line there too, Tierney backed off of this ride though. So they watched as Brenna giggled her way through the ride waving each time she passed them.  
  
They made their way through the kiddie rides and were soon at the Ferris Wheel, Buffy begged off saying she would just hold Tierney if Spike and Brenna wanted to go on this one. Brenna looked a the tall wheel and hesitated for a moment before grabbing Spike's hand, "I want to ride it."  
  
"Okay, lamb. Let's get in line." He pulled more tickets from his pocket and handed them to the man running the ride. He settled her into the seat beside him, making sure she was secure. The ride started slowly as they began to load each seat, the higher they went up the quieter Brenna became.  
  
"You okay, Brenna?" Spike asked noticing how still and quiet she had become.  
  
"It's high up." She told him, her eyes wide as saucers.  
  
"Yes, it is, but I'm right here with you." He took her small hand in his, "I'll take care of you."  
  
"Okay." She held his hand tightly and managed a small smile.  
  
After the first rotation she seemed to relax a bit and even waved at Buffy and Tierney on the ground below. But Spike could see she was releived when the ride was over. "Let's take a break from the rides and we'll go get something to eat, okay?"  
  
"Sounds good to me, those candied apples are calling my name." Buffy walked towards the snack wagon.  
  
"I want that." Tierney pointed towards the pink and blue cotton candy.  
  
"Me too!" Brenna chimed in.  
  
"Look they even have blooming onions!" Spike exclaimed as Buffy placed their order.  
  
They found a picnic table and sat down to eat thier goodies. Happiness seemed to just roll of of them and Buffy couldn't remember the last time she had this much fun. That's when she saw her coming towards them smiling that cold polite smile. "Buffy." The familiar voice made her cringe.  
  
"Hello, Deanna." Buffy managed a smile.  
  
"Well look at you and the girls and," Deanna turned to Spike, "a new man. Well I guess it has been a while since my brother died."  
  
"A little over two years, Deanna. " Buffy replied cooly.  
  
"Yes, I've meant to call. But...you know how busy things can get. Jay and I brought the children tot he fair tonight, you wouldn't recognize them they've grown so. Speaking of, Brenna do you remember me, I'm your Aunt Deanna."   
  
Brenna shook her head, "No."  
  
"Deanna she was only two the last time you saw her at David's funeral."  
  
"And this must be Terry." Deanna turned to Tierney.  
  
"Tierney, her name is Tierney." Spike shook his head with disgust at the woman.  
  
"Oh, yes, I'm sorry. And you are?" She politely offered her hand to Spike.  
  
He ignored the hand, "I'm William."  
  
"He's mommy's friend." Brenna added helpfully.  
  
"Oh, I bet he is." Deanna raised her eyebrow at Buffy.  
  
"It was very nice to see you Deanna, but we promised the girls we'd try to win prizes so we need to go now." Buffy stood up from the table and picked up Tierney.  
  
"Nice to see you too, have fun." The other woman added in voice full of false sweetness before walking off.  
  
"She was a breath of foul air if I've ever seen one, that was your husband's sister?" Spike asked as they walked towards the game alley.  
  
"Yes, his only family left. She never really liked me, thought I had a deep dark past." She sighed, "She didn't know how right she was."  
  
"But her brother loved you despite it all, right?" Spike stopped walking and adjusted Brenna in his arms. He couldn't imagine Buffy losing her husband and his only living family left could be that vile, his poor girl, she had really been through the wringer.  
  
"Yes, he did." Buffy smiled at the thought, "He used to say that Deanna must have been adopted."  
  
"He's probably right." Spike told her as he stopped in front of a game stall, "This look okay, Brenna?" He asked as he put her down.   
  
"I want that one!" She pointed at a large purple version of Mr. Gordo.  
  
Spike accurately threw each soft ball into the large milk can, the man working the booth looked surprised as he handed Brenna the large purple pig. Tierney then picked out a blue teddy bear and giggled happily when Spike handed it to her. "You want something, luv?" He asked Buffy feeling quite confident.  
  
"No, thanks." Buffy smiled back at him. The vendor looked relieved when they walked away from his booth.  
  
Tierney held tightly to the blue bear as she rested her head on Buffy's shoulder. "I think someone is getting sleepy. Maybe it's time to go home?"   
  
"Yeah, I think you're right." Spike answered as he watched Brenna yawn and lean her head against his chest. "It's been fun though, right girls?"  
  
"Lots of fun." Brenna mumbled against his chest.  
  
"Fun." Tierney replied with a sleepy smile.  
  
"I think everyone had a good time." Buffy leaned against Spike and he put his free arm around her as they walked to the car. To anyone watching they appeared to be a sweet little family, Buffy smiled at the thought.  
  
******  
  
Giles hung up the phone and frowned and cursed and paced his livingroom before picking up the phone and calling Angel.   
  
"Hello!" Angel answered on the first ring.  
  
"Angel, how could you not let me know that Spike was back from the dead or undead so to speak?" Giles accused angrily.  
  
"The same way you didn't bother to tell me that Buffy's husband was dead, that she was alone and struggling the last couple years. How could you do that Giles?" Angels voice was as anger filled as Giles.  
  
"I suppose I deserve that." Giles sighed into the phone, "My only excuse is I thought it was what was best for Buffy."  
  
"I didn't tell about Spike because he asked me not too.....at the time he thought it was what was best for Buffy." Angel replied with his own deep sigh.  
  
"This can't end well, you know that." Giles tone was weak, he knew he'd lost this battle.  
  
"Maybe not, but I think.....I think this time maybe we all need to stand back and let Buffy finally get to decide what's best for her. Over the years..we...all of the men in her life have done things we thought were best for her and sometimes she suffered more for our decisions than she would have if we had maybe let her decide?" Angel's tone was thoughtful.  
  
"Perhaps you're right. I...I tend to want to keep her away from anything that might hurt her, she's had far too much pain in her life. I suppose my judgement is sometimes clouded by personal feelings about certain individuals in Buffy's life." Giles conceded.  
  
"I've talked to Spike, he is finding a place in Tennessee, he's going to do his best to make sure she's happy, Giles. He's not my first choice, but he is Buffy's choice...." Angel's voice was soft, "We've always thought we knew best.....but maybe this time she does."  
  
"Maybe, I suppose I owe her an apology." Giles shifted in his chair and sighed, "I will call her tomorrow, and if she'll listen to me..I'll apologize."  
  
"She'll listen, she can be stubborn but she has an amazing ability to forgive." Angel smiled into the phone.  
  
"I suppose she does." Giles agreed as he hung up the phone.  
  
****  
  
"I'll help you get them to their room." Spike whispered as he carried a sleeping Tierney and Buffy carried a snoring Brenna to the bedroom.  
  
He watched as Buffy pulled back the covers on the bed and removed Brenna's shoes, he followed suit and pulled back Tierney's blankets, lie her down and removed her shoes too. Buffy dug around and brought back two nightgowns handing the smaller one to him. She gently removed Brenna's shorts and top and put the nightgown on without even briefly waking her. Tierney opened one eye and frowned at him as he tried to put her arm through her shirt, "Let's get your jammies on." Buffy told her as she watched Spike's struggle. The little girl helped him a bit and held her arms up for the nightgown.   
  
"Night, night." She yawned as she snuggled next to the large blue teddy bear already almost asleep again.  
  
"Night, night." Buffy and Spike replied in unison. Buffy turned out the light and they left the sleeping girls.  
  
"Would you like something to drink? I don't have anything stronger then iced tea," She teased as she walked into the kitchen.  
  
"I'm okay, but you go ahead." He sat down at the table while she poured herself a glass of tea and then sat down across from him.  
  
"Thanks for going with us. The girls had a great time." Buffy sipped her tea, "I had a great time."  
  
"Thank you for asking me to go. I had a great time too.....in fact, " He reached his hand across the table and covered hers, "I would say it was the second best night of my life." Bright blue eyes met hazel as they both remembered what he had called "the best night of my life."  
  
Buffy almost blushed, "And you're still terrified, right?"  
  
"Not so much now." He tightened his grip on her hand never letting go as he stood up and walked around the table to where she sat. He leaned over and kissed her ever so slightly on the lips, she tasted like peach iced tea and he licked his lips when he pulled back from the kiss.  
  
Buffy watched his tongue and suddenly it was very hot in the kitchen and her iced tea wasn't helping a bit. She stood then and wrapped her arms around his neck leaning her face up towards his for another kiss, this one not quite so gentle. They stood in the kitchen wrapped around each other, lost in the kiss. Buffy broke away for a moment and took his hand silently leading him out of the kitchen and through the livingroom towards the hallway. His eyes met hers in a silent question , she only nodded and smiled at him. He kissed her halfway down the hallway to her bedroom.  
  
The loud ring of the phone shocked both of them back to the present, "Should you get that?" Spike asked as the phone rang shrilly once again.  
  
"It's probably Giles trying to make nice. Let him stew a little while. The machine will pick it up."  
  
Buffy grinned at him raising her eyebrows at him, "Unless you'd rather listen to me talk to Giles."  
  
"The machine can get it." He said quickly scooping her into his arms and carrying her into the bedroom.   
  
"Buffy, this is Dawn. Please pick up if you're there." The familiar voice came through onto the machine.  
  
"You better get it, luv." Spike told her he sat her down on the bed.  
  
"I guess so." Buffy sighed as she picked up the phone, "Yes, Dawn, I'm here. But this better be important!"  
  
"It is important." Dawn replied, after a moment something occured to her, "Buffy, why did this need to be important? Am I interrupting something? It's late and I know the girls are asleep, so hmmmm......what could you be doing? You aren't alone are you?" Dawn giggled into the phone.  
  
Buffy couldn't help herself, she giggled back, "No, I'm not alone." She rolled her eyes at Spike.  
  
"Hello, Bit." He called into the phone.  
  
TBC 


	7. part seven

Dawn giggled on the other end of the phone, "Tell him I said hello!"  
  
"You can tell him yourself." Buffy grinned as she handed the phone to Spike.  
  
"Niblet." Spike spoke into the phone, "I'm guessing I owe you a thanks."  
  
"Yeah, you do." Dawn giggled again, then became serious, "How are you, Spike?"  
  
"I'm good, better then I have been for a long time." He smiled at Buffy as he talked.  
  
"You'll take care of her and the girls right?" Dawn asked.  
  
" Till the end of the world." He answered as Buffy took his hand and gave it a warm squeeze.  
  
"Then I guess this a mutual thank you fest." Dawn's voice was full of happiness.  
  
"Ask why she called?" Buffy whispered from beside him.  
  
"Sis wants to know why you called?"   
  
Dawn answered excitedly, "Carson and I are coming to town next weekend. Make sure that's okay with her, not sure she'll have time for us now that "you're" there." She teased him.  
  
Spike turned to Buffy, "She's coming for a visit. Wants to know if that's okay?"  
  
Buffy leaned into the phone, "That's wonderful. When will you be here?"  
  
"She said next weekend." Spike answered for Dawn.  
  
"I guess I'll let you go, I'll call with more details later in the week. You two have a "nice" evening." Dawn laughed softly as she said her goodbyes.  
  
Spike hung up the phone and turned to Buffy again, "Now where were we?"  
  
She leaned forward catching his bottom lip and lightly nibbling on it, "Just about here....."  
  
His hand inched her shirt up and he began to feel the smooth skin of her tummy.  
  
"Mommy!!" The cry interrupted his ministrations, Spike pulled back.  
  
"Tierney?" Buffy rushed down the hallway to the little girls room.  
  
She found Tierney crying in her bed, "Whats wrong, sweetie?" She held the little girl on her lap.  
  
"Scary." Tierney answered with a sob.  
  
"Did you have a bad dream?" Buffy asked as she smoothed the blond curls back from Tierney's face.  
  
"Uh huh." Tierney nodded as she held her mommy tighter.  
  
"She okay?" Spike asked from the doorway.  
  
"Bad dream." Buffy answered as she gently rocked the little girl.  
  
"It's okay, Tierney." He stepped into the room and patted her back.  
  
"Maybe it was just too much excitement tonight for her. " Buffy continued to rock back and forth as the little girl sniffled against her.  
  
"Maybe I should just go on home, let you take care of her." Spike kissed the top of Buffy's head.  
  
"But...." She gave him a small smile, "I really did have other plans for you."  
  
"I know you did, but that can wait. We said the girls were the priority." He smiled at her as he walked towards the door, "I'll call you tomorrow afternoon, I've got some apartments to look at tomorrow evening and I'll try to stop by after."  
  
"You're sure you're okay with this?" Buffy asked raising her eyebrows.  
  
"I am. We've got plenty of time, Buffy. I'll let myself out and lock the door. Goodnight." He said soflty as he left the room.  
  
"Goodnight." She replied with a sigh.  
  
Tierney finally fell asleep an hour later, an exhausted Buffy crawled into her bed and smiled as she thought about what almost had happened earlier, her smile grew bigger as she fell asleep dreaming of strong arms around her and sweet kisses all over her face.  
  
***  
  
Saturday mornings were special for Buffy, it was the morning she and the girls slept in. When they did wake up they enjoyed a special waffle breakfast and cartoons. Buffy did some laundry and played a game of Candyland with the girls, soon it was lunch time and after the girls decided to play in the sandbox in the backyard. Buffy finished the dishes as she watched them through the kitchen window. Around one o'clock the phone rang, she dried her hands off on a dishtowel and answered it, "Hello."  
  
"Hello, luv. What are you doing?" It was Spike's smooth voice.  
  
She smiled instinctively at the sound, "I'm watching the girls play in the sandbox."  
  
"Sounds fun, Tierney feeling better now?" He asked with genuine concern.  
  
"Yes, she fell asleep about an hour after you left." Buffy leaned against the counter to get comfortable and a better view out the window.  
  
"Good."  
  
"Did you sleep well?" Buffy asked hesitantly still not completely sure he had been okay with how the previous night had ended.  
  
He laughed, "Yeah after a very cold shower." She could almost see the smirk on his face.  
  
"I'm sorry about that." She replied softly.  
  
"I told you it was okay, and it is. Just had to tease you a bit. I'm not worried about when we....I mean it will happen when it should." He assured her.  
  
"So, when do you have to go look at the apartments?"   
  
"I meet the lady at six thirty tonight, it sounds like the perfect place. Two bedrooms and a balcony. I'll have to do some furniture shopping and such."   
  
Buffy grinned into the phone, "Shopping, I can help with that!"  
  
"I knew you could, pet." He laughed again.  
  
The laughter between them was new and nice, they both felt it. After a few minutes more, Spike let her go with the promise of a call after the apartment viewing. She went outside and played with the girls for a bit then brought them inside to lay down and try to take a nap. "Don't want a nap." Brenna complained loudly.  
  
"Then just rest for a few minutes okay?" Buffy told her as she put them in thier beds.  
  
The phone rang and she rushed to answer it, "Hello, Buffy." Giles voice came across the line.  
  
"Giles, I'm really not in the mood to be told how wrong I am." Buffy sighed.  
  
"Good, because I'm not going to tell you that." Giles answered calmly.  
  
"You're not?" Buffy asked surprised.  
  
"No, I think....I think it's time I quit judging what was right and wrong for you. Buffy, you've been an adult for a long time now. I should be trusting you to make adult decisions about who you have in your life." He sighed.  
  
"Even Spike?" She asked unconvinced.  
  
"Even Spike. Now that I've got that out of the way how are the girls?"  
  
Buffy had to laugh at the sudden change of subject but she didn't push him on it, over the years she had learned that this was a typical Giles apology, "The girls are good, they are both napping right now."  
  
After catching up for another thirty minutes, Buffy hung up the phone a smile on her face.  
  
********  
  
Two nights later  
  
"This is beautiful." Buffy held Tierney on her hip as she ran her hand across the foot of the antique cherry sleigh bed.  
  
Spike had found and apartment and was now busy shopping for furnishings. He, Buffy and the girls had stopped at one of Memphis' many antique shops. "It is pretty and look a matching armoire." He held Brenna's hand as he went to inspect the large piece of furniture, "You really like this, Buffy?"  
  
"Yeah, look at the craftsmanship, it's lovely." She sighed wistfully, "It's probably not quite manly enough for you though."  
  
"Hmm..." He mumbled, "Brenna and I are going to look over here, okay?"  
  
Buffy nodded at him as she went to look at a display of depression glass.  
  
"Your wife, she really likes the sleigh bed? I can make you a good deal on it." An older woman stepped from behind the counter.  
  
"She's no ....." Spike caught himself, "Yes, she really likes it. How much for the bed and armoire?"  
  
The saleswoman smiled and quoted him a price, "That's not too much to make her happy is it? "  
  
"I'll take it and thank you." He smiled as he pulled out his wallet, Brenna still tightly holding his hand.  
  
"It will be delivered tomorrow." She told him as she handed him a reciept.  
  
Buffy joined him at the counter, "So what did you decide on?"  
  
"I went with the sleigh bed." He grinned at her.  
  
"We'll throw a masculine bedspread on it and you'll be happy." Buffy grinned back at him.  
  
"You have a lovely family." The saleswoman smiled at the couple in front of her.  
  
Buffy started to explain but noticed that Spike wasn't rushing to correct her, almost at the same instant they both replied, "Thank you."  
  
Once out of the store, Buffy looked at Spike, "It seemed easier to go along with her."  
  
"Yeah, it did." He kissed her cheek, "And I have to admit, it's nice to be thought of as someone's family."  
  
Buffy put Tierney down and took her hand, she took Spike's hand in the free one, "Family is nice."  
  
****  
  
Dawn arrived late Friday night with a sleepy little boy in tow. Spike carried her luggage in for her as Buffy led her to the guest room where she put Carson to bed. They stopped and peeked in at the girls who were already sleeping soundly.  
  
While Spike and Buffy got comfy on the couch, Dawn settled into the chair grinning at both of them, "It's so good to see you two together!"   
  
Buffy smiled shyly, "So Dawn what do you want to do while you're here?"  
  
"I want to babysit my wonderful neices while their mom goes out with her boyfriend for a real date." Dawn smiled brightly.  
  
"You didn't come all this way just to babysit?" Buffy shook her head.  
  
"No, I wanted to see you and the girls and Captain Peroxide over there. But I know you and I bet you haven't spent any time away from the girls together, have you?"  
  
"Well, no but it's okay, I love the girls." Spike started defensively.  
  
"Spike, I know you love the girls. But it would be kind of nice to go out alone, don't you think?"  
  
Buffy took his hand and began to rub small circles with her thumb across his knuckles.  
  
"Well, dinner might be nice." He warmed up to the idea quickly.  
  
"And then maybe back to your place to see the new furniture?" Buffy added her eyes wide.  
  
"And then maybe we could try out the....." Spike stopped midsentence as Dawn cleared he throat to remind them she was still there, "Yes, a night out would be nice. Thanks Dawn."  
  
"Your welcome, and you can stay out as late as you want, all night even." She gave them a wink.  
  
Spike stood up, "I suppose I should go, leave you two to the gossip. I'll be back tomorrow night."  
  
He kissed Buffy lightly and then hugged Dawn before he left.  
  
"Okay, big sis it's time to spill!" Dawn laughed as she joined Buffy on the couch.  
  
TBC 


	8. part eight

Buffy poured two glasses of coca cola and carried them to the living room, she handed one to Dawn.  
  
"Thanks," Dawn took a sip of the soda, "He looks good."  
  
"Yeah, he does." Buffy smiled.  
  
"Oh yeah." Dawn grinned appreciatively.  
  
"Dawnie!" Buffy feigned surprise, "You're a married woman!"  
  
"But I'm not blind." Dawn broke into giggles.  
  
Buffy joined her laughter, "It feels good with him here. I'm sure it won't last but it feels good." Buffy's voice was soft and wistful.  
  
"It will last this time, Buffy." Dawn put both hands on her sister's shoulders, "You deserve this, it's time for you and the girls to have some happiness."  
  
"That would be good and he really seems to want to be here. It's just scary, he says he won't leave, but he has before."  
  
"That was before, Buffy. I think you've both changed now, it's time for you to be together." Dawn assured her with a yawn.  
  
"I hope so." Buffy covered her own yawn with her hand. "I suppose we should go to bed."  
  
"Good idea, I was thinking we could go to the zoo tomorrow. Then tomorrow evening I can help you get ready for the big date!" Dawn followed Buffy down the hall as they went to thier bedrooms.  
  
"Sounds good, night, Dawn." Buffy told her as she went into the room.  
  
"Night."  
  
****  
  
The zoo trip went off without a hitch, Dawn and Buffy enjoyed watching their children intract with each other and enjoying the animals. After lunch they returned home with exhausted children who all went down for long naps.   
  
The children woke up in time to find Dawn helping Buffy pick out clothes for her evening out. "I just don't have anything to wear!" Buffy complained as she lay yet another outfit on her bed.  
  
"You have lots of lovely things, Buffy. Anyway Spike could care less what you're wearing, you could wear a burlap bag," Dawn told her then switched to a terrible British accent, "And he would say 'doesn't she look beautiful?'"   
  
Buffy grinned at her sister, "I suppose this would be okay." She held a simply cut black dress in front of her, "Just a little jewelry and some heels, this would be okay for dinner out?"  
  
"It's perfect." Dawn agreed with her.  
  
Buffy lay out the dress and her shoes and jewelry. She and Dawn then watched a movie with the kids and Dawn started their supper while Buffy showered and got ready.  
  
Spike knocked on the door slightly after dark, he was dressed in dark slacks and blue button down shirt, he seemed almost nervous as Dawn let him in. He was carrying a small bouquet of flowers in his hand.  
  
"Nice touch, Spike. She'll love them." Dawn patted his shoulder, "I'll go get her."  
  
"Feel like I'm going to prom!" Spike complained as he took his seat on the couch.  
  
"You love it." Dawn teased as she went down the hallway.  
  
"You look nice, Mr. Spike." Brenna's voice came from the doorway to the kitchen.  
  
"Thank you, Brenna. I'm gonna take your mommy out to dinner. Is that okay with you?" He helped the little girl up on the couch beside him.  
  
"Yeah, it's okay. Aunt Dawn said we could play games and watch a new movie tonight." She scooted next to him, "Mommy pulled out all of her clothes from her closet today. She was fussing that she didn't have anything to wear, but she has lots of clothes!" Brenna explained as Spike listened with a smile.  
  
"Mommy is like that sometimes, but we love her don't we?"   
  
"Yep." Brenna nodded in agreement.  
  
**  
  
"He's here, Buffy." Dawn stuck her head in Buffy's room.  
  
"How do I look?" Buffy asked as she put in her earrings.  
  
"You look lovely. That dress is perfect." Dawn hugged her sister, "Now go and have some fun."  
  
Buffy grinned when she saw Brenna next to Spike on the couch explaining the intricacies of Candyland to him, "Hey." She called out softly.  
  
Spike's eyes grew wide when he saw her, 'Hey. You look wonderful." He stood up and offered her the flowers.  
  
"You do too. Thank you." She sniffed the bouquet, "These are lovely."  
  
"I'll go put them in water for you." Dawn told her as she took the flowers, "Tierney come say bye to mommy."  
  
Tierney came into the livingroom with Carson toddling beside her, she ran to her mommy and hugged her legs, "Bye mommy."  
  
Brenna joined her, "Bye mommy. Bye Mr. Spike."  
  
Buffy knelt down beside the little girls, "Bye girls, be good for Aunt Dawn."  
  
"Now, shoo, out of here." Dawn waved them out the door.  
  
****  
  
"This is so nice," Buffy told Spike as she sipped her wine, " A real sit down restaruant."  
  
"It is nice to go somewhere without a drive thru." Spike agreed as he cut his steak.  
  
"I hope the girls are behaving for Dawn."   
  
"I'm sure they are luv, they are great kids." Spike assured her.  
  
"They really like you too." She smiled shyly now.  
  
"I like them and their mother too." He reached across the table and touched her hand.  
  
"I kind of like you too." She gave his hand a squeeze.  
  
The next half hour was spent with talk of the girls and Dawn and her family. The conversation was easy and comfortable. When Spike leaned over to wipe a bit of red velvet cake off of Buffy's chin he couldn't resist and he gave her a gentle kiss on the lips.  
  
"Well isn't this sweet, my poor dead brother's wife making out like a teenager in a restuarant." Deanna's shrill voice spoiled the moment.  
  
Buffy pulled back from Spike horror and embarrassment on her face, "Deanna."  
  
"Deanna!" A tall man from behind the woman called.  
  
"Buffy, " the man began to shake his head apolgetically.  
  
"Don't Jay, it's not your fault." Buffy began to shake her head.  
  
Deanna turned to her husband glaring, "You can't approve of this?"  
  
"Deanna, it's none of my business just like it's none of yours." Jay spoke calmly and deliberately to his wife.  
  
"It is my business she was my brothers wife, the mother of his children and she's behaving like this, Deanna started off on her tirade but was interrupted.  
  
"Deanna until the other night at the fair, you hadn't seen your brother's children in two years. It's a bit late to play worried aunt." Buffy replied icily.  
  
Jay covered a smile, "Deanna lets go."  
  
"You're going to let her talk to me like that?" Deanna turned to her husband.  
  
"Yes, because it's long overdue. You've been cruel to Buffy any chance you get and it's wrong and as for your earlier question, yes I approve and so would David. He loved Buffy and would want her happy. Deal with it, Deanna." He turned to Buffy, "Best of luck to both of you." then back to his wife, " I'm leaving dear, if you want a ride you better come with me now."  
  
Deanna's eyes grew wide, "I... I..I never...."  
  
"Perhaps that's the reason for your attitude." Spike smirked at the woman.  
  
Buffy held back a giggle as she watched Deanna walk off in a huff.   
  
"Such a lovely woman." Spike said with such fake sincerity that Buffy could not hold in her giggles any longer.  
  
When she had gained her composure, Spike asked for the check and they decided to take a walk along Beale Street. The sound of blues music floated out of the many clubs along the famous street. Spike held her hand as they walked, her mood had turned serious. "What's wrong, Buffy?"  
  
She stopped and looked up at him, "Do you think that other people will think it's wrong that I'm moving on with my life?"  
  
"Some might, but you're friends will be glad for you and there really the only ones that matter. Are you having second thoughts?" He tried to hide the worry in his voice.  
  
"No, no second thoughts. In fact I think I'm ready to go see the new furniture at your apartment." She smiled at him trying to allay his worry.  
  
"You sure?"   
  
"Positive." She kissed him for emphasis.  
  
The ride back to his apartment was quiet, Buffy sat as close to him as possible her head resting on his shoulder. Once there, he parked the car and opened her door for her. She followed him to the apartment. Her eyes widened with surprise when she saw the newly furnished apartment, "It's beautiful. You didn't need me at all." She gave him a faux pout.  
  
"I always need you Buffy." He replied sweetly.  
  
She lowered her eyes at the reply, "How do you do that?"  
  
"What?" He asked with a shrug.  
  
"Know just what to say, make me feel so good with your words." She took his hand, "Show me the apartment."  
  
"Okay, heres the livingroom, and there's the diningroom," He led her to another room, "This is the kitchen."  
  
"You've done a great job. I'm impressed." She squeezed his hand, "Now the only room left is the bedroom."  
  
"Well, you see I've been thinking about that....I kind of think we might skip that room tonight and do that other thing you were talking about." He led her back into the livingroom.  
  
Buffy looked confused, "What other thing?" She sat down next to him on the couch.  
  
"That word thing...we need to do some talking. I need to know...we both need to know some things before we go any further." Spike's tone was serious but he was smiling letting her know it was all going to be okay.  
  
"So you want to talk instead of..." She smiled back at him, "Okay, we can talk, it's just that after the other night I thought...you wanted."  
  
"I did, I do want... but I want it to be right. I've been thinking about the girls and well, Brenna asked me about being her daddy."   
  
"She mentioned that to me too." Buffy leaned back against the couch cushion, "I'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable, but she's just a little girl and I think she see's everyone around her with a daddy and she....."  
  
"She wants one too, it didn't make me uncomfortable, Buffy. In fact it was nice....I didn't ever think I would have a chance, hell, that I would ever even want the chance to be a daddy." Spike took a deep breath, "But I think that I would like that, if things work out the way I want them to with us, I want to be there for the girls. I want us to be real family."  
  
"You really want that?" Tears sprang to her eyes.  
  
"Yeah, I do. But I need to know if that's okay with you. I mean you asked earlier about people thinking badly of you for moving on. I don't want you or anyone else to think I want them to forget their dad. I know he was a wonderful man, he was good to you and he loved his daughters. But I want to be there for them now." Spike looked into her eyes almost scared of what he would see there.  
  
Her eyes shone with the unshed tears, "You're right, David loved me and he loved his daughters. That's why I know that he would be okay with this, he would want the girls to have someone to look after them and.....love them." She lay her head on his shoulder, "You really see us as a family someday?"  
  
"I hope so, but that's why I'm not rushing you into anything, I just want it clear what I want to happen and make sure thats okay with you." He turned and kissed her forehead.  
  
"It's more then okay with me, and you're right about the rushing. When it's right we'll know." She sighed, "It is okay to neck on the couch a little isn't it?" She grinned at him.  
  
"I think so." He grinned back as his lips found hers.   
  
An hour of fervent kissing passed before they pulled away from each other. Buffy sighed, "I think I should probably go, check on the girls. It's not that I don't want to stay..."  
  
He pushed her hair back away from her face, "I know...I think it's a good idea for mommy to be home in the morning too. I'll take you home." He kissed her once more before they left.  
  
**  
  
"Buffy, what are you doing home? I thought you would probably be gone all night." Dawn had been asleep on the couch.  
  
"No....we decided that maybe it wasn't quite time for that yet. We talked about the future and about the girls and what we want." Buffy explained with a smile, "It was nice."  
  
"It sounds nice and very serious. So you talked about the future?" Dawn sat back down on the couch pulling a pillow into her lap.  
  
"Yeah, he wants to be in our future, the girls and I. He wants to be a father to them. But we don't want to rush it."  
  
"Good plan." Dawn hugged Buffy, "I think it's going to work out this time."  
  
"I think maybe you're right." Buffy replied softly.  
  
The next few days passed quickly, Dawn and Buffy enjoyed spending time with the kids and just visiting with each other. Dawn left feeling better about her sister then she had in a very long time,   
  
she made Buffy promise that she and Spike would go out on a real date all alone once in awhile and she agreed.  
  
****  
  
The weeks stretched into a few months. Buffy was happy at her new job and Spike was even doing some work for Angel in the area. Spike became a familiar face to Buffy's friends and coworkers, he helped with the kids and even went to the program the daycare put on, grinning at Tierney and Brenna as they sang "I'm a little teapot".   
  
Things became easier yet more complicated between Buffy and Spike, they were very comfortable together, the words "I love you", passed between them easily. The problem was that both were afraid of letting the other know that they were ready to move to the next step, they were both afraid of being the 'pushy' one.  
  
Spike spent the night before Brenna's fifth birthday party putting a small bicycle together for her. Dawn and her husband along with Carson came in to town for the party. When everyone except the family had left ,Spike took Brenna out in the dusky darkness and ran up and down the sidewalk holding on to the bike while she cried out "Don't let go, don't let go!" Then she squealed with joy when she realized he had let go and she was riding the bike by herself. Spike was as proud as any father could be when she took off by herself down the sidewalk and turned to come back towards him, "I'm riding it!" She told him with a thousand watt smile lighting her face.  
  
Buffy and Dawn stood in the driveway watching, "He's so good with the girls, Buffy."  
  
"I know. They really love him too." Buffy replied wistfully.  
  
"What's wrong?" Dawn asked concerned.  
  
"We decided to take it slow and now it's like we're stuck...things are so good now, we're afraid to go any further." Buffy shook her head, "Silly, huh?"  
  
"No, just cautious. Maybe you need to tell him you're ready for the next step? He's probably as scared as you are." Dawn patted Buffy's arm.  
  
"Maybe the next time we get some alone time, I'll talk to him."  
  
Buffy watched as Brenna rode the bike up in the driveway, Spike following her.  
  
"Shawn and I can keep the girls tomorrow night, why don't you plan on talking to him then?"  
  
"Actually, I think maybe I have a plan to show him that I'm ready. It would be great if you could keep the girls for me tomorrow night." Buffy smiled secretively.  
  
"Luv, what's that look for? What are you two planning?" Spike asked as he put Brenna's bike in the garage.  
  
"Us?" Dawn replied innocently, "Nothing."  
  
Buffy nodded her head in agreement, "Nothing at all."  
  
Spike said his goodbyes and kissed her goodnight. He went back to his apartment still feeling suspicious about she and Dawn's conversation.  
  
****  
  
The Next Evening  
  
****  
  
"That's what you're wearing?" Dawn frowned a little as Buffy entered the room.  
  
"Yeah, I want to keep things simple." Buffy took another look in the mirror, "Do I look that bad?"  
  
She was dressed in a simple white peasant top and jeans, very little makeup and her hair piled up and held with a clip.   
  
"You look great, I just thought you might dress up more." Dawn smiled at her sister.  
  
"Part of tonight's going to Spike is that I feel comfortable around him anytime and no matter how I'm dressed. I know he loves me no matter what." Buffy smiled brightly, "Now I'm going to check on the girls and go. Thanks so much for staying with them tonight." She hugged Dawn and left the room.   
  
Both girls were sleeping soundly when she left the house. It was almost ten o'clock, Spike had worked tonight but he would be home by now. She knocked confidently on his door.  
  
"Buffy?" He let her in, "I was just going to call you, is everything okay? The girls alright?"  
  
"Everything's fine. I just had to.......I wanted to tell you that I'm ready.." She hesitated momentarily.  
  
"Ready for?" He asked hopefully.  
  
"Ready to see that bedroom furniture." She replied chewing on her bottom lip.  
  
"You're sure." He asked raising his eyebrow at her.  
  
"I am." She answered taking his hand in hers and leading him towards the bedroom door.  
  
Once in the room they both seemed to have lost some of their earlier confidence, "It does look good in here." Buffy said softly as she patted the quilt on the bed.  
  
"Yeah, it does." Spike sat down on the bed.  
  
Buffy cautiously sat down beside him, "Comfy." She commented as she bounced a little bit.  
  
"Yes, but it has one flaw." Spike told her very seriously.  
  
"What?"   
  
"It's big and I get lonely." He gave her a sly smile as he reached for her.  
  
"You won't be lonely tonight." She laughed softly into this lips.  
  
TBC 


	9. part nine

Authors note: I have a different version of this chapter posted at my site, I'm never really sure about the ratings and would rather be safe then sorry, so the version here is pg13 while the site version is probably more R rated. My site url is in my profile.  
  
Disclaimer: The poem excerpts in this chapter are Love's Philosophy by Percy Blysshe Shelley and She Walks in Beauty by Lord Byron.  
  
Their kisses became more fervent and Buffy pulled back for a moment to start unbuttoning Spike's shirt. He let her remove the shirt and then reached for her dress, she lifted her arms and he pulled it over her head tossing it on the chair with his shirt. "The rest of them." She nodded towards his pants, he grinned as he stood and pulled them off leaving them to lie in the floor.  
  
He stood before her in his naked glory and she began to laugh, his expression turned to confusion, "Whats so funny?"  
  
"I guess in your case, the answer is still 'none of the above' to that boxers or brief's question."  
  
He pulled her close to him then, enjoying the feel of her against his chest, they sat on the edge of the bed like that for several moments just enjoying the embrace. "I really missed you." He whispered into her hair.  
  
"I missed you too." She whispered back against his chest.  
  
Hands roamed over familiar bodies and sighs became moans. Whispered 'I love you's' filled the rooms and after several hours passed they lay in the big bed cocooned under the quilt tightly wrapped in each other's arms. She lazily traced random circles on his chest with her fingertip as he quoted poetry to her from Byron, "She walks in beauty like the night. Of cloudless chimes and starry skies. And all that's best of dark and bright. Meets in her aspect and her eyes" Which Buffy proclaimed as lovely - to Shelley's "Love's Philosophy" He quoted the last verse in his strong voice.  
  
"See! the mountains kiss high heaven,  
  
And the waves clasp one another;  
  
No sister flower would be forgiven  
  
If it disdained it's brother;  
  
And the sunlight clasps the earth,   
  
and the moonbeams kiss the sea:-  
  
What are all these kissings worth,  
  
If thou kiss not me?"  
  
Buffy rolled on top of him and kissed his soundly. Another hour later finally exhausted they fell asleep still in each other's arms. Buffy slept more contentedly then she had in the last two years.  
  
Spike woke first smiling down at her in the crook of his arm. He looked at he clock and saw three o'clock glaring back at him, as much as he hated to leave this little bit of heaven, he shook her softly to wake her, "Buffy, luv. Wake up."  
  
"Hmmm." She opened one eye, "Hey....." She opened both eyes and smiled her hair tousled from lovemaking.  
  
"I need to get you home before daylight. I think it's probably a good idea if you're there when the girls wake up." He kissed her lightly as he got out of the bed.  
  
"You're probably right. Thank you...for thinking about them." She stood and kissed him as she began to look for her clothes.  
  
"We have a little time though, are you hungry?" He asked as he pulled on his pants.  
  
"Well, now that you mention it, I guess I have worked up an appetite."  
  
He watched as she ran his hairbrush through her tangled locks the simple act filled his heart with happiness. She caught him staring, "I'm sorry, I didn't think." She sat the brush down suddenly shy again.  
  
"No, use it. I'm just happy you felt comfortable using it. You're welcome to anything here, Buffy." He smiled at her, "I'm going to cook you some eggs and toast and then I'll get you home."  
  
"Thanks." She finished dressing and joined him in the kitchen where he had two plates sat at the counter, "Smells yummy."  
  
"Have a seat and we'll eat." He motioned towards the barstool and poured her some juice.  
  
"You keep lots of food for someone who really doesn't need it." She told him as she took a bite of eggs.  
  
"Never know when I might have company." He smiled back at her as he bit into his slice of toast.  
  
"Ah, so you have breakfast company frequently?" She raised her eyebrows.  
  
"Actually you're the first."   
  
"And I better be the only." She flashed a grin at him.  
  
"A jealous girl.....I think I like that." He laughed softly.  
  
She rolled her eyes at him, "This is nice." She took a sip of her orange juice.  
  
"Well, it's nothing fancy just a bit of breakfast." Spike shrugged/  
  
"No, not the breakfast," She shook her head and continued, "Yes - the breakfast is nice, but the just sitting here together, just 'being' it's nice."  
  
"It is. Think I could get used to it." He happily agreed.  
  
They finished breakfast and she insisted on helping him wash the few dishes, "I'm not ready to leave you yet, lets get the dishes done and then I'll go."  
  
"Alright, Luv, not really wanting you to leave either, but it's for the best." He kissed the top of her head as she began to wash the dishes.  
  
After she had put the last dish away she sighed, "It's getting close to sunrise, I guess I better go."  
  
"Yeah, but there will be other nights." He leaned his forehead against hers.  
  
"Promise?" She leaned against him.  
  
"I do." He smiled to himself, he really liked the sound of those words.  
  
Spike drove her home and watched as she let herself into the house before driving back to his apartment feeling lighter and happier then he had in years.  
  
*****  
  
Two months later  
  
****  
  
Buffy and Spike sat on a bench watching Brenna and Tierney play in the sandbox. It was a warm night and there were a couple of other families enjoying the park too. Spike patted his pocket repeatedly, he had three special gifts inside and was just waiting for the right moment to talk to Buffy.  
  
"That's mine." Brenna called out as a boy took her sand bucket from her and started to walk away.  
  
"It's mine now." The little boy shouted back.  
  
"No, it's mine." Brenna stood and pulled on the bucket, the little boy fell into the sand on his bottom.  
  
"I'm gonna tell my daddy, you pushed me down." The bully smirked at Brenna, still holding her bucket.  
  
"I didn't push you, you took my bucket." Brenna frowned.  
  
Spike and Buffy had witnessed part of the scuffle and were now headed towards the sandbox.  
  
The little boy noticed them coming towards them, "Is that your dad? Cause my dad's much bigger, he could beat him up."  
  
Before Brenna could answer, Spike stepped in, "Here now, give her back her bucket."   
  
"He said his dad could beat you up." Brenna offered as the boy grudgingly handed her the bucket.  
  
"He did. Well I don't think it's gonna come to that." Spike leaned over and picked Tierney up from the sandbox then took Brenna's hand in his.  
  
"Your dad's a chicken." The little boy laughed behind them.  
  
Brenna pulled her hand free and ran back to the little boy kicking him in the shin before Spike or Buffy could stop her. "He's not a chicken!"   
  
The little boys father had heard the last part of the conversation and was approaching them, "I'm sorry she shouldn't have kicked him." Buffy took Brenna's hand firmly in hers, "We don't kick."  
  
"He'll be fine, he shouldn't have been teasing her, I'm sorry." The man apologized and took the little boys hand leading him away.  
  
"Got to admit she did have good aim, she's her mother's daughter." Spike whispered on the way out of the park. Buffy shook her head at him.  
  
"Why did you kick him, Brenna?" Buffy asked as they loaded into the car.  
  
"He said my dad......Mr. Spike was a chicken. I know he's not my daddy but.....that made me mad." Brenna crossed her arms across her chest.  
  
"Well, hitting people isn't a good way to deal with things when you're unhappy." Buffy told her seriously.  
  
"Like I said she's her mother's daughter." Spike mumbled under his breath earning a glare from Buffy.  
  
When they arrived home, Buffy bathed the girls and let Spike read them a book before tucking them in. He sat down on the couch and dug into his pocket, now was as good as time as any he supposed. "Buffy, can you come here. I need to ask you something."  
  
She came into the livingroom with an armful of towels, "Just a minute I want to put these in the laundry room."  
  
"This will only take a minute." He grinned at her.  
  
She sat down the dirty laundry on her lap.  
  
He took a very deep breath, "I know we said we didn't want to rush, but I think things are going well and I can't find a reason to put this off. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?" He opened his hand and revealed a diamond engagement ring sitting in his palm.  
  
Buffy stared at the ring for a moment, "You're asking me to marry you?"  
  
"Yes. I love you, people in love get married." He gave her a worried smile, she hadn't answered yet.  
  
"After you've implied my daughter gets violent tendencies from me and I'm sitting her in sweat pants and my hair tied up, dirty laundry in my lap and this is when you propose?" She giggled nervously.  
  
"I thought about a nice romantic dinner, but earlier at the park, I realized that this is our life, the kids and baths and reading time and laundry and." He took her hand in his, 'You haven't answered and I'm not being pushy but....."  
  
She pushed the laundry into the floor and crawled into his lap, "Yes, I will marry you." She peppered his face with kisses. He took her hand in his and slid the ring on her left hand.  
  
"Do you think the girls are awake still?" Spike asked between kisses.  
  
"Probably, why?" Buffy still sat on his lap.  
  
"I have something for them and I want to make sure this is okay with them." He fumbled in his pocket and pulled out two small charm bracelets with silver hearts hanging on them.  
  
"They'll love them and they love you, it's going to be okay. Let's go check on them." He followed her to the girls room.  
  
"Brenna, Tierney. " Buffy could hear them whispering.  
  
"We're going to sleep, mommy." Brenna assured her mom as Buffy turned on the light.  
  
"It's okay, we need to talk to you." Buffy and Spike sat on the end of Tierney's bed, Buffy offered her hand to Brenna who joined them.  
  
"See this pretty ring on mommy's hand?" Spike showed the girls the engagement ring, "I gave that to mommy because I love her and I want to be a family with her and you. We're going to get married. Is that okay?"  
  
"You're going to be my daddy?" Brenna asked a hopeful expression on her face.  
  
"If that's okay with you." Spike nodded at her, "In fact I got one of these for you and Tierney. It's like your mommy's ring." He fastened the small bracelet around Brenna's wrist, "This is a gift to you to show you how much I love you. Thats what the heart stands for."  
  
Brenna stared at the bracelet and smiled. "Thank you." She crawled over Buffy and put her arms around his neck, "I knew you were going to be my daddy, I knew it." She whispered as she hugged him tightly.  
  
He put Tierney's bracelet on her arm and she grinned at him . After many hugs, they tucked the girls back into the bed and turned out the light, "Night mommy, night Mr. Sp......daddy." Brenna called out as they left the room.  
  
Spike wiped at his eyes as they left the room, Buffy smiled at him, "Something in your eye, honey?" She teased softly.  
  
"Yeah, must be dust or something." He smiled as he pulled her close to him.  
  
TBC 


	10. Part 10 epilogue

Spike sat on the couch holding Buffy close to him, "The girls do seem happy, don't they?"  
  
She looked at him love shining in her eyes, "Yes they are happy, I knew they would be." She tried to cover a yawn. It was late and they had made several phone calls to announce thier news.  
  
"I'll go, you're tired." He kissed the top of her head.  
  
"Can I just sit here beside you awhile? It's nice, you're a great pillow." She closed her eyes as she cuddled against him.  
  
He laughed softly, "Sounds good to me." He made himself more comfortable and he watched her sleep. Thinking about the earlier reactions from friends and family.  
  
Dawn had screamed excitedly so loudly he could hear her from where he sat. Angel had quietly accepted the news with sincere congratulations, Xander and Willow were both surprised yet supportive and Giles....Giles had sighed and then wished them the best. They had all promised to be there for the wedding.  
  
***  
  
As the sunset, the bride walked into the garden behind the Dixon Gallery, she was preceded by  
  
Brenna and Tierney in matching pastel blue dresses they threw white rose petals down the pathway and both of them grinned up at Spike while they stood to the side. Buffy dressed in an ivory lace tea lengh dress, her hair up, a small bouquet of white roses and baby's breath in her hands she joined Spike in front of the Justice of the Peace.  
  
The vows were simple and sincere. The "I do's" said with such love and sincerity that Willow and Dawn sighed and teared up. Even Xander and Giles had to smile at the look of complete happiness on the couples faces.  
  
A small reception was held at their house, where family and friends congratulated the happy couple and caught up with each other's lives. Buffy and Spike kissed Brenna and Tierney goodbye before leaving for a short honeymoon. Dawn was staying with the girls.  
  
Buffy pulled the satin robe tighter around her as she stood on the balcony of their hotel room, a glass of champagne in her hand while she stared at the full moon. Spike joined her in his matching robe, the robes were gifts from Dawn. He wrapped his arms around her lying his head on her shoulder. "Happy?"  
  
"Ecstatic." She murmured as she sat the glass down and turned into him, lying her head on his chest, "Tell me it's going to be perfect like this all the time." She smiled against him.  
  
"Can't do that, luv. We promised to be completely honest." He smiled back at her, "I can however promise that even when things go off and imperfect, I'm going to be there trying my best to make them right again."  
  
"That's fair enough." She ran her hands under his robe and on to his smooth chest, placing small kisses on the exposed skin.  
  
The rest of the night was spent in perfection.........  
  
*****  
  
Epilogue  
  
*****  
  
Years later.........  
  
"Spike, honey, you need to talk to her. Explain how you feel." Buffy kissed his shoulder.  
  
"Won't change her mind, she's still going." Spike replied sullenly.  
  
"No, it won't change her mind." Buffy smiled at her husband, "But it might make it easier for her if she knows why you don't want her to go. You really don't want her to go off to college with the two of you at odds, do you?"  
  
He turned around to face her, "No, I don't. I want to know why you are so calm about this? You who have dealt with blood and guts, fainted when she broke her arm. But she can go a thousand miles off to college and you're okay with it."  
  
"I'm calm because one of us has to be. I'm going to miss her but I know in my heart this is right, she's worked so hard for this scholarship and she's going to be a wonderful doctor. She wants to do cancer research and who knows maybe she'll make a huge breakthrough someday. In your heart you know it's the right thing too, you just don't want your little girl here where you can keep an eye on her." She leaned up and kissed his cheek.  
  
"I'm going outside for a minute." He kissed the top of her head, "Be right back."  
  
"Okay. Don't take too long, we've got to leave for the airport soon." She patted his arm as he left.  
  
****  
  
Spike stood against the farside of the garage as he lit the cigarette. It glowed red in the dusky darkness. He felt before he heard the small footsteps coming around the corner, "I said I'd be in   
  
in just a minute." He really hated for Buffy to catch him smoking, he didn't do it very often anymore only when he was under stress and sending Brenna off to North Carolina for college counted as stress.  
  
"It's me." Tierney raised her eyes at him she saw the cigarette.   
  
"Oh, you've come to nag at me?" He grinned at the teenager in front of him. She was a pretty sixteen year old, petite like her mother with golden blond hair hanging down her back.   
  
"No, not to nag, but just to tell you Brenna wants to talk to you." Tierney leaned against the garage wall, "She's been crying...she thinks maybe you'll never forgive her."  
  
"She's crying?" His voice softened, couldn't stand to see any of his girls cry.  
  
"Yes, I told her you were just being 'daddy' though. You just hate letting us out of your sight. Scared something might happen to us out there in that big bad world." Tierney sighed.  
  
"You're going to miss her too, aren't you?" Spike asked ruffling the girls hair the way he had done when she was little.  
  
"Yes, I am. But Brenna's smart she'll be okay. Are you going to be this bad when I leave?" She asked seriously.  
  
"Depends, where do you plan on going to college?" He asked raising his eyebrow.  
  
"Oh...I don't plan on going to college, think I'll just find some guy in a rock band and be his groupie, write you postcards from around the country." She gave him a smirk worthy of himself and then burst into giggles.  
  
"You are a cruel child." He laughed along with her, "You know I love you and Brenna and just want the best don't you?" His tone was serious again.  
  
"Yes, daddy, I do. Now go talk to her, her bed is covered with her luggage so she's crying on 'my' pillow!" She gave him a gentle push towards the house.  
  
"Fine." He ground out the cigarette and carefully picked up the butt putting it in the trashcan.  
  
"Why do you do that? Mom knows you smoke sometimes, she just lets you think you're getting away with it." Tierney shook her head at the relationship between her parents, she hoped someday to find happiness the way they had.  
  
They went into the house, Buffy smiling at Tierney and mouthing "Thanks" as she watched Spike walk down the hall to Brenna's room.  
  
***  
  
He knocked lightly on the bedroom door, he could hear her sniffling as she called out, "Come in."  
  
"Hey." He called out as he entered the room.  
  
"Hey." She answered as she sat up and wiped her eyes.  
  
"I guess I'm responsible for those tears?" He asked softly as he sat beside her on the bed.  
  
She just nodded and looked at her fingernails.  
  
"Brenna, I'm sorry. I know I've been hard on you lately. I just........I just hate to see you go so far away. I'll miss you and I'm gonna worry so much." He sighed as he ran his hand through her dark hair.  
  
"I know you'll miss me daddy. But I'm going to be fine. Mom and you have taught me what I need to know. You did your job well you should be happy!" She gave him a small smile.  
  
"Part of the problem is that I still want you to be the little girl that drew this," He opened his wallet and pulled out a yellowed paper and unfolded it, in childish scrawl was written 'Happy Father's Day, love Brenna' she had drawn a stick figure with bright yellow hair.  
  
"You still have that?" Brenna asked in surprise.  
  
"Of course," he smiled at her and then touched the charm bracelet on her wrist, it had several links added to it through the years but she still wore the bracelet faithfully, "You still have this."  
  
She smiled at him her eyes brimming with a different type of tears now, "Of course I do. You and mom seem to think that somehow it's a miracle that you two found each other again. Me....I've known since I was four years old you were going to be my daddy so really it's because of me you're together!" She laughed softly, " I love you...but I really do have to do this, I have to go."  
  
"I know you do sweetheart, I've been stubborn. I just want you to be careful and it would probably be a good idea to stay away from men while you're there." He tried to keep his expression serious.  
  
"Daddy!" She exclaimed as she hugged his neck tightly.  
  
"I'm serious, if you go near one I'll be able to smell him, when we visit." Spike warned her with a grin.  
  
"Mom is so right, that vampire smelling thing is gross." Brenna pulled away from him. She and Tierney had first been told about Spike's "sun allergy" when they were very young, when they were a little older the whole truth was revealed. Both little girls loved their daddy so much that this little twist never bothered them.  
  
"I'll help you carry your bags out now." He stood and grabbed a suitcase.  
  
Buffy and Tierney were waiting in the livingroom, Buffy smiled as she watched Spike coming down the hallway, suitcase in hand. The trip to the airport was one of the hardest trips the parents had ever made. After a tearful goodbye to Brenna, they dropped Tierney off at a friends house and went home to the quiet house.  
  
"She's going to be fine." Buffy told him as she settled into the bed next to him, "Are you?"  
  
"Yeah, I'll be okay." He turned to her gathering her up in his arms till her head rested on his shoulder, her arm across his chest, "I love you, you know that?" He smiled as he played with a lock of her hair.  
  
"Yes, I do." She snuggled even closer, "I love you too."  
  
And through the coming years....graduations and weddings and births and loss of loved ones. Their love is what sustained them....at times Spike worried how he would get by when Buffy's time ended and he was left behind but he knew he would find a way to go on for the children and the grandchildren and as always it would be "For Her".  
  
THE End 


End file.
